I got this from Wigglebottoms.

My first attempt garnered me an ooopsie, you are bad.

Hi! I’m Santa’s Head Elf!
Unless I’m terribly mistaken, it looks like you just wrote something that had a naughty word in it! I’m quite sure my little elfin eye saw you typing a word that looked an awful lot like “u@smell “. Good thing I caught it before anyone had a chance to read it. Otherwise, you would have ended up on the Naughty List for sure! (See, you never know when an elf might be watching you! *wink*).

I think it was me telling him I would tell people he smelled like butt if I did not get what I wanted.

Okay, I got it through by saying I would tell people he had the aroma on a men’s bathroom after an overdose of ExLax.

And here is my reply: (edited the boring parts out)
Read the rest of this entry ?

If you are planning on changing yellow and magenta toners at work, black pants are bad. v.v. bad.

Yeah. It’s one of those days. Ask me to do something for you, and I will probably fuck it up.

WHERE is my head?

A man forced his way into a primary school in northeast China Friday and stabbed and injured 12 grade-one pupils, the latest in a wave of recent school attacks in China, Xinhua news agency said.

The man, whose identity was unknown, was seized and the injured pupils taken to hospital near the school in the northeast province of Jilin, the agency said.

A series of attacks on schoolchildren in China in recent months have prompted schools in Beijing and other cities to recruit professional guards.

Last month, a man broke into a Chinese school dormitory in the central province of Henan and stabbed eight children to death in their sleep.

A bus driver stabbed 24 primary school children with a kitchen knife and kidnapped a nine-year-old girl at a primary school in eastern Shandong province in September.

The same month, a man with a knife and homemade bombs attacked 28 children in a kindergarten in the city of Suzhou, near Shanghai. No one was killed. In August, a janitor stabbed 17 at a Beijing kindergarten, killing one child.

Chinese police arrested a man accused of killing a 5-year-old boy and his teacher at a Beijing kindergarten in October.

Holy fuck.

source

You ready? No liquids in your mouth?

Read the rest of this entry ?

and Afton! So cool to share a birthday!

I hope you had a great day with Griffin and Holden.

*hugs*

I saw this topic at Snidget’s, about things we do not need to hear from our co-workers.

These are mine. Every single one of these are TRUE and I did not even change their NAMES! Because I am ballsy like that.

#1
Fran: “I have this really big pimple like thing on the inside of my labia”
Me: O__O

#2
Jan: “Um, I was wondering if you could come over tonight and give my husband a blow-job, because he is getting a vasectomy tomorrow, and I really hate giving him blowjobs, so I thought maybe you would do it?”
Me: O__O

#3
Laurie: “Do you think this means anything? My vaginal discharge is dark green".
Me: O__O

This is pretty much how I wash mine. I just fling the water on to my face and laugh.

You?

(apologies in advance to my sister, Princess, who may recognize this photo)

Eric Kasner.
Jun 11, 1963 - Aug 28, 1995

Friend. Son. Artist. Passionate. Kind.

He was my friend. And I miss him very much.

Hope it was a good one!

Easy <---- go visit him as a present.

I hate when this bitch comes to visit.

She just takes over.

Read the rest of this entry ?

Yesterday, my sister called to wish me a happy thanksgiving. This is the sister formerly referred to as Pinkie.

She was drunk.

She is not supposed to drink because she had that gastric bypass surgery. But she was drunk. Alone. Drinking Kahlua.

Very alarming, considering she is an alcoholic.

For some reason, this year it is harder to pretend it is okay being alone on another holiday.

Peeps. They’re not just for Easter anymore.

It doesn’t matter. Sooner or later, Peeps go bad.

Do not eat these. Do not feed them to your children. Even if they look like little snowmen. Or bunnies.

They are nothing but thugs.

I think I forgot to let you know.

And the damn National Enquirer is saying that a “source” said that Vincent was faking and trying to get attention, because he is an attention grabber and is really lording his place as star of the show over everyone.

They are SUCH big fat liars.

El santo Maria del Bocadillo Asado a la parrilla de Queso

translation: Saint Mary of the Grilled Cheese Sandwich.

p.s. this sold on eBay for $28,000 and the person wants to take it on a world tour.
It is a ten year old sandwich.

Does anyone besides me stand in the greeting card aisle, reading cards and chortling with abandon, while enduring stares from people with sticks up their asses?

Last night, I bought a birthday card for my stepdad.

Outside:
On your special day, I wanted to say thank you for all the time you spend giving me advice..

Inside:
I don’t follow any of it, but you have such a nice speaking voice.

Heeeeeeee.

I love cards like that because the ones that say: “Thank you for always being there and showing me your love and support” do not apply and Hallmark does not seem to make cards that say: “Were those beatings supposed to teach me something?” or “On your birthday, I’d like to give you a beatdown, just like the ones you used to give me”

I know am a mediocre BAD housekeeper, but…

do people really know where EVERYTHING is? Last week, on Joan of Arcadia, the mom heard from her old boyfriend.

So, she goes over the hutch and pulls out a picture she has not looked at for 20 some years.

Somehow, that seems a little weird to me.

But this is me… who loses clothes in a 600 square foot apartment.

Exchanging glances…

what were the chances?

I think I overdid it this weekend.

I woke up this morning, with a fever of 102.

Slept till 4 pm, MT.

Oops.

And just so you know, walking outside to walk a dog with a high fever in below freezing temperatures actually HURTS.

Feel free to send cookies.

Heh. I love how nervous people are getting about bloggers.

At my work, at least once per day, someone comes and says “Okay, tell me about blogging again” or “What software do I need to buy to read RSS?”

Wonkette spoke on Saturday, offering no apologies for the criticism that blogs like hers “could sway the audience". Yeah, I am pretty sure this country was pretty undecided about who it was voting for until the bloggers posted the exit polls.

Personally, I think the media people sound afraid of us. We spur them into action, we force them to talk about things they may not otherwise have reported, and there are enough bloggers out there with ENORMOUS credibility with their facts.

One woman said what I found to be an odd thing.

Mindy McAdams, a University of Florida journalism professor, applauded bloggers’ efforts but urged them to adhere to ethical standards held by mainstream journalists. “Blogging is really great. I like that more and more people have a voice. That’s good … But it doesn’t give people who call themselves journalists an excuse to not check out the information.”

Thanks Mindy. Professor Mindy.

Do we call ourselves journalists? I call myself just a plain ordinary blogger.

I think I was going to make a point, but I just realized I am VERY tired. But Oooh, Ahhh, look how Tuckle’s design is coming along.

G’Nite.

Wordpress is as good as cocaine for keeping a girl up all night.

*stares at clock*

I MUST go to bed.

NOW.

More tweakage tomorrow.

Oh, I remember that sad day, as if it was yesterday.

Oolong the bunny went to the Rainbow Bridge.

Funnily enough, I happened upon the page again, and I am happy to say that a NEW Bunny is thriving under the same loving care as Oolong did.

Meet Yuebing.

Go check it out. It’s very heartwarming.

God help me, I wake up every day tired because of bad dreams.

Last night, I was slightly drunk on some tequila. I went to a party, and for some reason Roy Horn was there. Everyone was being really mean to him, including my boss. I got up in her face, and I left the party.

Then, I was at the home of a friend, and was looking for more liquor. I realized Paisley, my dog, was missing, so I asked Sue where she was. She started crying. I started screaming at her… “Tell me!!!” and she said Paisley had been killed. I demanded to know where her body was. Sue started signing at me, but it was incomprensible signing.

I started breaking things, yelling “Where is Paisley???”

Sue kept signing, so I threw a pitcher of water on her. She was sitting on an electrical cord, so she was getting electrocuted. I tried to pull on her nightgown to pull her off the cord, but I could not save her.

Then, I laid on the floor, screaming about Paisley.

Freaky, no?

I saw in a blog that blogs that do not talk about the bloggers are bloggy-badness.

So, what do you want to know?

I am forty-something. Single. (except for Vincent D’Onofrio, my boyfriend). Au Naturelle… meaning no hair dye, much the chagrin of my stepfather who insists “you will never keep a man if you do not dye your hair!". I am allergic to mascara and eyeshadow. Really. So, no eye makeup either. I do love Pinch My Cheeks by Origins though. *nods* Only blush I use.

Read the rest of this entry ?

I just talked to John. I have spoken of him before? The one I love, forever and ever and ever?

It was nice to talk to him. I was teasing him that I am older now than he was when we first met, and so that makes him very very old.

He said he likes it because he does not think about sex all the time.

Heh.

Maturity. It’s FUN!

In Georgia, parents are filing a lawsuit to stop schools from basically promoting the Bible’s version of creation vs. the theory of evolution.

Backed by the ACLU, they are charging that textbooks that are specially stickered with a disclaimer about evolution are mingling religion into the teachings.

Here is the disclaimer:

“This textbook contains material on evolution. Evolution is a theory, not a fact, regarding the origin of living things. This material should be approached with an open mind, studied carefully, and critically considered.”

WTF? So, the biblical version is FACT?

If that is all you want your children to hear, then send them to fucking parochial school.

Just keep walking.

There is nothing to see here yet.

I gotta get a base install including design set, before I even attempt to import my MT.

Till then, visit the old me at One Girl’s Life.

*seen at Kim’s*

MY family values include gay families.
MY morality includes honesty and social justice.
MY faith demands that we keep government and religion separate.
_________________________________________

I am so glad someone stepped forward. I am PROUD to be a Liberal.

So, this woman I work with brought me a fairly complex workbook to deal with.

It did not take me long, but to Excel virgins, it seems like a big deal.

She called me a miracle worker.

I wanted so BADLY to say to her:

Excel is mah bitch.

Then, I thought better of that idea.

:)

Duets by Charlotte Church and Josh Groban.

Gravedigger - Acoustic, by Dave Matthews

Vincent D’Onofrio being my boyfriend.

Rori + Vincent = 4 EVAH

These are all positive things.

But with each tear comes a new resolve to work even harder for change and to resist erosions to our freedoms.

God Bless America.

Dear Bitch Upstairs:

Hi. We’ve never met, but you are starting to annoy the fuck out of me.

I usually hate you in the mornings. How many times DO you need to slam your cabinet shut anyway.

But tonight? I hate you because you are vacuuming. See, there is this thing called COURTESY. Generally speaking, you try to remember this is an APARTMENT building.

So, knock that shit off, or I will superglue your door shut one day.

:)

Love,
Rori.

This is the one adds 64 cents to each pack of cigarettes, bringing the tax per pack to 84 cents.

I think this tax is essential.

So, this is a good thing.

2004 Presidential Election
Electoral Votes:

Bush
213

Kerry
311

Too Close To Call
Nevada (5)
Colorado (9)

Oh man, if Kerry wins, there is one blogger I will be visiting to tell him “EAT THIS, MOTHERFUCKER".

Pfffft. Saying people like me are why he is Republican.

I can barely stand the anticipation.

Right after I voted I wanted to jump up and down and scream!

KERRY
KERRY
KERRY

Earthquakes
Earthquakes for sale.
Check out the deals now!
www.eBay.com

Hmmm. Let me go bid on an earthquake. Do I get to pick where it happens? This could be very handy!

*shifty eyes*

Currently:
27 F
RealFeel®: 4 F
Winds NW at 25 mph

The winds make it worse.

Brrrrrrrrrr

Well, it looks like Gmail and I will have to part ways.

The Zonealarm fix works, but then I have to deal with mass quantities of popups from other sites.

It’s a trade off, but I would rather NOT have pop-ups.

*sigh*

Life can be so complicated. *giggles*

I hate how I can get into such a spiral of bad thinking that everything and I mean EVERYTHING in my life goes kaput.

It’s like there is some little voice inside me that says:

You deserve to be miserable, you SHOULD be fat, your house is a pigsty and people stay away from you because THAT IS WHAT YOU DESERVE.

I really hate feeling this way.

I honestly believe I will go to my grave never having had anyone love me. I mean love Me. Rori. The girl inside.

on the lj of phantasmyc. It really hit home for me. The sentiment about Not Bush I mean. This rings true for me, as I am sure it does many Americans.

The most important thing about this election for me, well, the thing that scares me most about Bush continuing in office is the continued damage which will occur to our civil liberties. America as we know it will NOT exist in 4 years.

That said.. I have to say that anyone who gives me the argument that they are going to vote for Bush because at least he is a KNOWN, and Kerry is an UNKNOWN and that could be worse…well, please. Just go over and read One Thousand Reasons

I am NOT ashamed to say I would be voting for Gilligan if he was the other candidate. I have never been this scared IN MY LIFE. Had you asked me four years ago if I would take a “Just vote against him!” attitude, I would have vehemently said no.

Okay, if you have been dozing off during the first part, now is time to pay attention:

Now? We live in America folks, and until unless a LOT of us get OFF our asses and get the system changed, voting for anyone besides a Republican or Democrat is a waste of a vote. Sorry, it is how I feel, and frankly, I think it is reality. It’s like saying to a little kid… You get an Apple or an Orange. PERIOD. No Jello, No Ice Cream. no pony. APPLE OR ORANGE. Do your research of those two, and fucking PICK.

But apparently, I digressed.

About that icon, that is me. NOT BUSH. That is how I am voting. I am quite happy with Kerry now, I truly am. I think he rocks. But had it been Dean, Edwards, Kucinich, anyone, I would be for them.

Because me?

NOT BUSH!

I found this site earlier, and I read it through.

It’s SPOOOOOOKY!

Correspondence from Mark Condry

I am switching to WordPress.

The rebuild time on MT is kicking my ass.

If you did not have to rebuild the entire site for minor changes, it would not be so bad.

So, if I disappear for a few days, you will know I messed up.

Heh.

Hi.

I have read that changing the mt.cfg by adding a line that says throttle seconds 60 greatly reduced the amount of spam received.

Can anyone tell me where in the mt.cfg I need to add that?

I am very depressed at getting 100+ spam per day, in spite of adding the close comments plug in, disabling html, blocking MASS quantities of IPs, despamming using MT-Blacklist.

The other thing I am going to try today is displaying pop-up comments, because apparently that helps as well.

Thanks!

signed, depressed spam getter

Mortification is when you realize that you misread the notice saying the Orkin Guy was coming in to your apartment, and you realize he has been here already, before you have a chance to clean up the wall-to-wall mess in the apartment.

And when I say WALL-to-WALL I mean it.

*hides*

Put on some fucking clothes.

Performer Maria Eugenia Rito of Argentina arrives at the MTV Latin Video Music Awards.

And the thong OVER the jeans? Jebus.

Just wanted to warn you.

I have a new domain name and I will be redirecting this one to that one.

Gotta love the excitement, no?

Hmmm. I wonder if I have to rebuild all my IP Bans?

*sigh*

Stupid CNN.

In a story about Deaf students struggling to get diplomas because they struggle with English, CNN states:

Deaf students like Lane who have relied their entire lives on the shorthand of sign language to communicate often have a tough time catching on to the subtleties of the written word, which can be as hard to pick up as a second language.

NEWSFLASH

Sign language is not SHORTHAND and English IS their second language.

Yanno, if you don’t know shit, you should keep your mouth shut.

There are some valid points in the article, but JEBUS.

Now the fucking spam fuckers are sending trackbacks!

If I delete them in MT, will it delete them from their places?

I am so upset!!!!!!!!!

Every day, when I walk out in the morning, and I see Pikes Peak, I get so calm inside.

I especially love it in winter, when it looks different every day.

edit:

Actual photo from my office window at work.

You can see views of Pikes Peak during daylight hours here.

If I ever meet someone who actually clicks the shit in the blog spam, I am going to bitch slap them and then cold cock them.

I am.
I mean it.
so.not.kidding.

These are real USB cards.

source

Americans Going to Canada for Flu Shots

Shit!

There are terrorists* there, the drug is not FDA approved, and it could have come from a third World Country!

WTF are these people thinking!!!!!

* My friend in Canada was told she is required to prove to the FDA that she is not a bioterrorist because she wanted to send some store-bought wrapped candy to the US. Mind you she can send a home baked cake, but not that candy! Because OMGWTF!!!11!!!Eleven!!! she could be a bioterrorist.

So, I am having a shitty day and I decide to come in for an early morning blog.

What do I find? 200 spam. Thank god for MT-Blacklist throttling their asses, but still. FUCKERS.

I really need one night of sleep without waking up screaming two or three times. I really do.

I really need this shit with my car resolved. They have had it TWO WEEKS. I feel so powerless and stupid. Truly. I feel like this mistake just might fuck me up for years.

I hurt. I have not shared about this a lot, but I have been in physical pain of one kind or another since my teens. And I gotta say, it really wears you out.

Okay, that’s all. I just needed to vent.

This is the top shelf of my new computer armoire.

Questions?

Daily Kos had a video snippet you must see to believe.

I would recommend only watching it if you can download 20+ megs, because it does not stream well, and yeah, poor dude’s bandwidth would be fucked.

I did transcribe one bit of it, because I could not BELIEVE he said it.

“He (David Kay) tells me that is really hot and uh coming from Texas of course, I know the definition of really hot. The difference of course being our air conditioners work in Texas and I appreciate your hard work.”

But even more frightening than his words, is his delivery. This is a man, who more than usually, has extreme difficulty stringing together words. In one case he spoke of David Kay saying… “Today David Kay came in to the Oval Office to brief my national security team (pause….) and me” with the “and me” like a startled afterthought.

It’s truly frightening. Watch it before you vote for Bush.

*giggles* Yeah. Like anyone voting for Bush reads this.

Mer?

Bush was drooling. DROOLING. Spittle on the side of his mouth. Like a rabid dog.

On CNN, they had three live bloggers. They had the lighter side, which really has no meat in regards to the debate, but it is funny.

They had the right side (be clear here, right in this context does not mean correct), which is conspicuous by its lack of support for Bush.

Then they had the left side. My favorite quote from that blogger:

I’m a little insulted that Bush is this cavalier about the facts. What does he think – that we trust him? After his fibs, falsehoods and fabrications about Iraq, no American with a brain will ever trust him again.

This sums up my feelings about people who support Bush. I am not name calling but I honestly, from the bottom of my heart, do not understand why they would be voting for Bush. As yet, no one has edified this point for me. Rather, they just get pissy and bring up Kerry’s war record, as if Bush’s lack of a war record is a moot point.

Nonetheless, the blogs are interesting to read.

As you know, I had some issues with the car I bought.

The update is… I know nothing. I have not heard from the dealer, so I presume they are fixing it. I called them and they said they would call me when it is rectified.

In the meantime, I am just grateful I have a loaner, as opposed to renting.

Okay, here is a pet peeve of mine.

People who say “It’s Deja Vu all over again.”

That is so redundant.

One can simply say “It’s Deja Vu".

Jebus. Learn how to properly use your French borrowed words.

I have a roaring case of Sciatica.

It’s one of those fun things that NO MATTER WHAT you do, you cannot stop hurting.

Sit? Hurt.
Stand? Hurt.
Lie down? Hurt?
Bitch slap a stranger? Hurt.

Meh.

I have an LJ and these are two of the icons I am using.

These were created by a very talented person, sans_espoir.

It’s no secret I like Vincent D’Onofrio. I have not tried to hide it.. I think he should have been named Sexiest Man Alive, I dreamt he was my boyfriend, I admitted for secret lust for him grew when I realized he was left-handed, I was pissed at ALL of you for not getting him to me for my birthday.

That’s fine. But tonight on Law & Order: CI, he took sexy to a new level. His hair is longer, and curlier. The grey temples shine silver and add a new masculinity to him. His top lip makes the cutest little pucker. Look at those lips! Look, I say!

What can I say. RORI <3 Vincent D'Onofrio!

Dressed for Halloween awhile ago.

I am the whore in purple.

The other woman was the inspiration for the Passionate Patty character in an early Leisure Suit Larry game.

I know, it’s a bit blurry of a photo.

I have not blogged about this yet, because I feel ashamed.

The car I just bought? Well, when I got it, the blower for the AC was making a little noise, so no big deal it would be covered under warranty.

Then, when I drove it at night, it seemed like the headlights were out of alignment. Again, no big deal.

So, I took it back to the dealer, who still owed me a detailing, since I did not get it the night I got the car. They took it over to the Chevy dealer to fix those two things.

Well, the Chevy dealer calls me. Turns out they cannot fix the headlights because the car had been in an accident and the thingie that holds the lights in properly will not work until there is a little bit of body work done.

I feel like … shit. I feel like I am so fucking stupid and quite possibly made the biggest mistake that could fuck me for years.

I told the dealer that I bought it from and they said “We will make it right” whatever the fuck that means.

Wish me luck, okay?

Oh, also the Chevy dealer says they could not hear the bad blower motor. So, I have to apparently get someone IN the car with me and show them the noise.

I fucking HATE how car guys treat women. HATE.

But as for potentially making a big mistake on the car I bought… *cries*

Just taking a moment to think of John Lennon on the day of his birth.

Then, thinking of my friend Josh and hoping he is having a happy birthday.

Well, I have to admit, I had fun on the way home from work.

This SUV nearly swerved and bashed into the loaner car I am using.

I had to honk TWICE.

Then, as I was passing her, she waved her hand like “Wha…”

This meant she had no hands on the wheel because with the other one, she was talking on HER FUCKING CELL PHONE.

So, I flipped her off.

I continued, and soon, she very purposely pulled along side of me and slowed down.

I looked over and she was leaning forward in the driver’s seat, presumably attempting to give me a “look” that meant business, her mother in the passenger seat was squinting at me, and the three kids in the back seat were all leaning over to look at the honking lady.

I looked straight back at them, flipped them off and mouthed “Fuck You". Then I sped up.

Then, due to traffic flow, she got beside me again. So, I did it again.

It felt good.

Had her windows been open, I would have yelled at her. Alas, we are having a warm day.

British hostage Kenneth Bigley has been beheaded.

My prayers go out to his family and for peace in his soul.

I cannot imagine the horror of waiting weeks hoping your country would come save you, and then realizing they would not.

God, I can hardly bear what is happening in this world.

Kerry takes a slight lead in the polls.

Congress is looking to curb the SUV tax break.

The “Internet Spyware Prevention Act” bill passed in the house 415-0.

Someone searched my site for “Rori Naked”

Yesterday I had to call the county clerk’s office to find out why I had not yet received my voter registration card.

This what they said:

Please stay on the line as our menu options have changed. Please choose from the following nine options: (blah blah blah blah – 9 not applicable options later), Press *7 to repeat these options or, if you are using a rotary phone, an attendant will be with your shortly”

Does anyone really still use a rotary phone? Nonetheless, it was certainly preferable to listening to 9 options again. AND I got a real person.

Woot! The Raspberries are going to reunite to open a new House of Blues venue in New York.

That song, Please Baby Go All The Way reminds me of Randy Figueroa in high school. Oh how I loved that boy and his kisses.

Such a very lovely pretty woman.

But the eyebrows!

So wrong.

Especially when they are in your car.

I cardanced to Baby Got Back, all the way home. Just kept hitting repeat.

Doesn’t the Bangles song call Sunday the “Fun Day"?

Not for me.

It’s the “I’m gonna puke day". I am not really sure why, but I have a panic attack EVERY Sunday.

It’s odd. It’s not like I don’t like my job, because I do. It just happens. Maybe because I do not get as much done as I think I should?

Who knows. Right now I am catching up on blog reading, because I seem to get lax on that lately. I am going to try to add more to Bloglines, because that is easiest for me to manage at work.

Anyhow, Hugs to all. I am going to take some drugs.

p.s. Go look at the Bangles website. It is pretty…goofy.

Well, we here at One Girl’s Life (that would be me, Rori) like to make sure that you all are up to date on the latest Dave Matthews News.

edit: Awww, eBay took it down. But just picture an eBay auction with a urinal.

If you love you some Dave, you can now buy a urinal cake that “might possibly have been very close to Dave Matthews Pee Pee” on eBay. The seller makes no clarification as to whether he means Pee Pee as in urine, or Pee Pee as in Penis.

Although, I cannot really imagine why a urinal cake “might possibly have been very close to Dave Matthews” Pee Pee as in Penis. That seems kind of gross.

What are those things anyway? Do men pee on them? Lots of different men? Are they like little smell-good cakes of pee collection?

Imagine what a pair of underwear that “might possibly contain very very small remnants of Dave Matthews Poo Poo” would go for. OMG! They could be used to get DNA to prove it was HIS poo that was dumped from that bus!

Well, new for me. It is nearly new, 8,000 miles on it.

I feel like such a grown-up.
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Oh, thank the higher powers in the world for political commentary like Jessi Klein’s.

I just want to say how disappointed I am that we’re in the last half hour, and still, neither Bush nor Kerry has even mentioned what they plan on doing about the Kevin Federline-Britney Spears situation.

Just to whet your appetite.

They posted an article about the debates on their website AT 12:43 PST.

Fuck it! Don’t wait until tonight to find out what happened! Read their report below!
Read the rest of this entry ?

The House defeats the same-sex marriage amendment.

Meanwhile, in Iraq, eyewitnesses are saying that US military personnel prevented locals from rescuing people in a car that had gone off the road under fire of US forces.

6 people drowned. Two women, and four children.

Don Campbell, USAToday.com makes very trenchant observations about why absentee voting, and lack of vigilance over that process are “a prescription for fraud on a grand scale, and politically foolish to boot".

I strongly encourage to read this.

I have also included it behind the cut, because I want to save it forever.
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It’s not that I don’t think Arnold is a fine governor /snark, but banning cigarette smoking in prisons?

Who wants to lay money on a riot happening?

I know of what I speak, when I quit smoking, all I felt was RAGE. I hope they at least give them nicoderm. Or perhaps they will all switch to snuff.

source

Okay, maybe not, but if I DID, we could use the Sinulator! The Sinulator lets anyone control your sex toy over the Internet!

Okay, now go behind extended to see more. I did not want tender eyes to see the TOYS!

I gotta admit, just thinking about this got me a little “twitchy".
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WASHINGTON (AP) Rep. Diana DeGette called for a congressional investigation Monday into complaints that soldiers are being threatened with deployment to Iraq unless they re-enlist.

DeGette said several soldiers from Fort Carson, near Colorado Springs, called her office within the past few weeks to report such threats. She said she had heard similar reports from other members of Congress for several months.

Another blogger, wrote me in email, which to me means I will not say who it was.

But her logic for voting for Bush is that he is keeping us safe from terrorists.

My question is this:
Wouldn’t it have been better, if upon receiving the intelligence that terrorist acts involving airplanes were planned, to immediately tighten up airport security?

If the man cares so much about this country, didn’t the citizens deserve to know that?

I am in such a weird place in my life.

It’s like nothing feels the same anymore. I feel like I am moving into a new phase or something.

I had a panic about getting older this week. I started getting all dramatic, and thinking things like “I will probably not even outlive two more dogs!". As you can guess, this is not happy-making thinking, or productive in any way.

I read a line in a book recently that said “Live Life Like You Mean It". That resonated with me, and since then, I have begun to question the value of everything. Things like my fear. I have a really old car. But I am afraid to have a car payment.

In the meantime, I never go anywhere because I am afraid I will break down. So, the new me is asking herself… would it be better to have a payment so you could actually LEAVE now and again? Jebus, I am in a very very beautiful part of the country and I only travel back and forth to work.

I am totally rambling, my head is kind of twisted today… rambling thoughts and what not. But I do feel for the first time like I am moving in my life, instead of being stagnant.

They are postponing airing a 60 Minutes report on the rationale for the war in Iraq, because it would be “inappropriate” so close to the election…

BUT they are airing a show on Bush’s National Guard service instead?

Could someone PLEASE explain THAT rationale to me?

source

On the plus side, they are not making Dan Rather the scapegoat for the reports, they are letting him anchor the presidential election.

I had not seen this one before. Hee.

Nader has been struck from the ballot in Oregon. His only recourse is to take it to the Supreme Court.

This has to do with irregularities in his nomination petition, contrary to his cries that this is the Democrats weakening the system.

I lived in Oregon for about five years, and during the last election. The fringe people I knew voted for Nader to protest the two-party system. O_O Yeah, that was an effective use of a vote. Not.

source

Standing beside Iraq’s interim leader, President Bush contended Thursday that insurgents could “plot and plan attacks elsewhere, in America and other free nations,” if the United States pulled out. He said his top commander there has not asked for more troops but if he did, “I’d listen to him.”

Everyone, read that carefully. “Plot and Plan". Does he really expect that they are NOT plotting and planning because our troops are there?

Sweet, suffering fuck.

“I’m trying to find the correct name for it… this utter absolute, asinine, idiotic stupidity of men marrying men. … I’ve never seen a man in my life I wanted to marry. And I’m gonna be blunt and plain; if one ever looks at me like that, I’m gonna kill him and tell God he died.”

Oh, but he’s sorry.

If I was a member of his congregation, I would be raising my hand and saying “Why would you have to tell God? Wouldn’t he know you had killed him?” and let his pious assness squirm on that one for a while.

Can anyone say LATENT?

source

My god, we need to help the AIDS sitation in Africa.

In one place, tribal doctors are telling men if they rape a young child, they will be cured of AIDS.

So, one stepfather raped his ten-month old daughter.

TEN-MONTH. Not 10 years, 10 months.

I am trying to locate a quote for a friend.

It has something to do with until you step off the edge, you don’t know you can fly?

Does anyone know that one?

“Hi, I was just calling to see how you were doing, but since you did not answer the phone, you must be doing okay".

Yeah, either that or hanging from the rod in the closet.

The VEHICLES people, not the sex act.

So while our brothers and sisters are off in the Middle East risking their lives to secure America’s fossil fuel future, H2 drivers are pissing away our “spoils of victory” during each trip to the grocery store.

Okay, if you do, then you must check out:

FUH2- Fuck You and Your Hummer Too.

found this link at oscar’s.

As some of you know, I do get Playboy. So, I was glancing through one of their ubiquitous “girls of..” layouts and I came across one girl.

*warning again, this is nakkie girl bits. and I do not mean breastages*

This is what I saw.

Okay, now that I am looking at it all cropped, it does not look as icky, but jebus. Is that attractive? It’s so wide. It just does not look like it seems like it should look.

I’m just sayin’.

And oh yeah, the whole fully shaved trend? I think it is a little creepy. I guess I have met one too many men who think it makes women look like little girls, and frankly folks, that’s just fucking sick.

Has this ever happened to you?

I hope this artist’s rendition can show you just how this scenario plays out. You, driving down the lane in a parking lot.

People leaving the store, ostensibly heading toward their car.

Apparently, they think they must walk as leisurely as they can, right down the center of the aisle.

WTF?

Next time, I am going to get right on their asses, and HONK. I swear I am. No, really, I AM!

I just want to give people plenty of warning that later tonight, I am going to post a picture of something from Playboy, it will be nakkie girl bits.

The reason?

I just have to know if anyone actually finds it attractive at all. It just looks nasty to me.

Okay. Be back later.

If you do NOTHING else today, or even this weekend…

go read this:

A Story About Someone Else’s Ass

If you do not laugh, your cover charge will be refunded. In cash.

In case you have not heard, Amendment 36 will be on the Colorado Ballot this fall.

This amendment, passed, will allow the 9 electoral votes Colorado has to be split. So, instead of the current “Winner Takes All” electoral vote system, the electoral votes will be divvied according to popular votes.

Now, many people are analyzing why this may or may not be beneficial for the 2004 election.

Me? All I care about is that it passes, and that other states campaign to have this in their states.

Until every state in the Union counts votes in this way, IMO, not everyone’s vote counts. Had this been in effect in 2000, we would not be dealing with the Shrub right now.

This ought to make you feel a lot safer traveling on planes.

A guy who flew from Afghanistan and was catching a connecting flight at JFK was pulled over for a ROUTINE security check, you know the ones? The eenie meenie miny mo security checks?

In his bag were: “a Soviet projectile point detonating fuse and a surface-to-air and air-to-air cartridge.”

And some asshat (Assistant U.S. Attorney Lawrence Ferazani) said: “The fact that TSA located these explosives indicated the system is working”

*snort* Yeah, right. They COULD have pulled over the woman behind him in line.

Story copied in entirety in extended, as the main story on cnn.netscape.com changes a lot.
Read the rest of this entry ?

So, have not heard much about that lately?

Did anyone actually get one or did you just get the living spam beaten out of you?

I did not even sign UP for anything, and the spam whores are out to get me.

Good thing I used my super top secret spam account.

Franklin D. Roosevelt:
“A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned to walk forward.”

:)

I read about this on Marianne Williamson’s site.

If you are able to be dispatched to states where the help is most urgently needed, you can make sure that this election is properly monitored, and we do not have a replay of 2000.

In Florida, it has recently come to light that state officials may have violated federal laws by knowingly approving the creation of a “potential felon” purge list that disproportionately affected African American voters.

In 2003 in Philadelphia, voters in African-American neighborhoods were confronted by men with clipboards, driving cars with magnetic signs that looked like law enforcement insignia. But the men were not officials of any kind.

Just a month ago in South Dakota, Native American voters were sent to the wrong polling places, and given misleading information about the ID they need to vote.

Election Protection

You can also donate money if you cannot donate time.

peace.

The Milla Jovovich sci-fi sequel “Resident Evil: Apocalypse” opened at No. 1, ending the two-week reign of the Chinese martial arts saga “Hero.”

Yay! Go Milla!

“You’re wrong, because the bible says……”

Blast, Mushroom Cloud Reported in N. Korea

We’re stuck in this bad movie and we will be for another four years if John Kerry loses this election. America has a chance to oust this corrupt administration on November 2, but I fear that we won’t.

Well, it is SO good to know that Arnold is focusing on the real problems in California.

Source

I can barely watch this show because of the homeowners. The two? The one with her red lace bra or camisole hanging out from her shirt?

And the other one who has done her shirt really tight and her boobs are threatening to fall out?

Please ladies, it’s Trading Spaces, do you think you are going to get discovered or something?

Largish image, but very compelling arguments on why to vote against bush.

View image

Have you ever heard of it?

Apparently, it is a chicken inside a duck inside a turkey.

I am not making this up!

I do feel kind of sorry for the all trussed up turkey though. It looks kind of kinky.

But I guess if you don’t like fowl, you could try a Stuffed Camel.

And all of us who were affected by 9/11.

Kim and I are really on the same wavelength on this one.

Don’t lose sight of who did it. His address is not in Iraq.

(courtesy of silentemotion)
In “honor” of us hitting the 1,000 “mark", here’s a picture that’s worth 1,000 words, or in this case, lost innocent lives.

Maybe you’ll think twice before you vote for the man in the mosaic in November. At least then you’ll have put more thought into your vote than he did into this ‘unwinnable’ war on terror that we ‘will win’

Good
Both the House and the Senate have now voted to block the president’s overtime pay cut

Stupid Dick
And Cheney is blaming economic milestone misses on eBay! eBAY!

I just want to stay home today.

I want to read blogs, and get pissed.

I want to read blogs, and get happy.

I want to read blogs, and feel sad.

I just want to READ BLOGS.

Instead, I will go to work, and do various things that do not include reading blogs.

*sigh*

For some reason, yesterday I was thinking about all the things I did in junior and high school.

In junior high, I remember smoking in the bathrooms. We were always so convinced that the teachers did not know when they came in. Heh. If a teacher used to come in, we would hold in our smoke and walk out and exhale in the hall. Such goofiness.

In high school, we actually smoked pot in the bathrooms. The entire second floor was closed during lunch, and the loos were at the far east and west ends. They had some student monitor stand in the middle of the hallway as the guard. More often than not, that person would be reading a book. So, we would sneak around the corner, into the bathroom and smoke to our hearts content. I look back on that and realize we were completely insane.

Then of course there was some sex in the balcony of the auditorium.

Ah, the days of fearlessness.

President Bush offered an unexpected reason on Monday for cracking down on frivolous medical lawsuits: “Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”

*snort*

“It’s absolutely essential that eight weeks from today, on November 2, we make the right choice, because if we make the wrong choice then the danger is that we’ll get hit again and we’ll be hit in a way that will be devastating from the standpoint of the United States.”

–Dick Cheney, today

“Dick Cheney’s scare tactics crossed the line today, showing once again that he and George Bush will do anything and say anything to save their jobs. Protecting America from vicious terrorists is not a Democratic or Republican issue, it’s an American issue and Dick Cheney and George Bush should know that. John Kerry and I will keep America safe, and we will not divide the American people to do it.”

–John Edwards in response

source

(Pronunciation Key)ter·ror·ism

The unlawful use or threatened use of force or violence by a person or an organized group against people or property with the intention of intimidating or coercing societies or governments, often for ideological or political reasons.

Analogy? The Continued Presence of the War in Iraq.

As for my earlier post, which is now providing fodder for some of the more hateful bloggers out there, I say this. The United States is currently the bully of the world, and is setting the tone for other terrorist attacks.

If George Bush cared about anything on a human scale, he would certainly be addressing other issues than trying to maintain control of the area of the world that begats oil.

So, call me names if you like, call me stupid. But don’t be so ignorant as to use MY posts as a way for you to say “See? This is how the left is". That just shows YOUR ignorance. See my blog name? ONE GIRL’S Life. These are just MY opinions. I have never professed to represent anyone else, as I am sure many of the right would prefer not to be represented by your blogs.

Now, suck my dick, will ya?

I took Friday as a vacation day, and had today off as a holiday. Gosh, I am so relaxed and feel so calm. I have really enjoyed this time off.

I rearranged my bedroom, did some cleaning, shredded a bunch of stuff (I am a freak for shredding any mail with my name on it), balanced my checkbook, paid bills, played online, did some random acts of kindness, tried the Taco Bell Caramel Apple Empanada, had an orgasmic dream starring Julian McMahon, drank enough water, and… now I am going to watch Road to Perdition. All is well.

I read on someone’s blog yesterday about figging.com, which is, in essence, instructions on how to use ginger in one’s booty.

Then, on Erosblog, I saw a link to Things Not To Insert Into Your Lover’s Hoo-Ha.

So, what do I dream last night? Someone said they felt like they had something stuck in their bum, and I fished out about 50 pencils, scissors, combs, etc.

Someone help me.

I am trying to catch up on comments today. I have been remiss. I am sickeningly addicted to neopets.com and gaiaonline.com. Geeky me.

I really believe in commenting, as I feel we are all part of a big community. So, I will try to be better.

Eek. I just watched the first of tonight’s new Trading Spaces.

Kia’s room was horrifying.

WHY did she cut their wall just to stick that niche in? What did that add to the room?

And swag curtains with a GOLD crest thingie? Her designs are just tacky. Tacky tacky tacky.

I was catching up on my reading and visiting Cynical Cyn.

She linked to the Democracy Means You site, which I had not had the pleasure of visiting before.

I saw this:

Thank heavens for Paypal.

This is heartbreaking.

Take that back. BEYOND heartbreaking. and in turn, outrageous. Given that the current GOP government will do nothing about this. “Hard Science” and all.

found at scott’s.

I just upgraded to MT 3.1.

Hear me roar.

Hear me roar FUCK YOU SPAMMERS, thanks to Blacklist.

As the republicans rush to use the tragedy in Russia as yet another reason to elect bush, I have this to say to them…

if you are going to use it as a reason for him to be elected, then he has to take part of the blame for it.

Holden Fletcher Fraser was born August 16th.

The 10-pound, 4-ounce baby boy Griffin Arthur.

Heehee, Fletcher is the name of his character in Still Breathing.

the one that I call Psycho declared to me last night that she is thinking of going back to working on the streets to make more money.

(and when I say working on the streets, think fellatio, etc)

She says this in front of her 11-year old daughter.

And people say I am not nice to call her Psycho.

Well, news flash! She IS!

Right Fuckin’ ON!

I love them.

Source

You are missed, dear Princess.

I absolutely could not take that dark layout for one more minute.

More tweakage on link colors, etc. tomorrow.

Statement from the band:

To the people of Chicago and our fans:
Given comments being made in some of the emails we have received from fans and the comments we have seen in some of the media, we believe it is important to clarify where we stand regarding the bus dumping incident in Chicago.
Read the rest of this entry ?

Do you ever feel itchy in your own skin? Like you just want out? Like if you could just change every single thing right now, it would all be better?

I have no children. But if I did, I swear to God/Buddha/Jose Cuervo and every other higher power, that if they got NOTHING else from me, they would know that they were perfectly imperfect, that they got here with everything they needed, the world was theirs for the taking, and that their world was safe.

If my daughter asked me if she was pretty, I would tell her YES.

Go see them all here.

I was reading an article on Salon.com (which I tend to do every lunch hour). The article is called Got Guilt? and it talks about the problems of some workers in the dairy industry, how they have no advocacy against their bosses, no unions, they get minimum wage etc. They have to walk through shit, they are exposed to the chemicals the manure produces, etc.

And you know what? I so do not give a fuck about their plight. Why? They are illegal aliens, working under false social security numbers, etc. So do I feel guilty about them when I buy cheese? Hell, no.

Do I think the dairy industry are bad dogs for even knowingly hiring these people? Hell yes.

In a highly anticipated ruling, a federal judge found the Partial-Birth Abortion Ban Act unconstitutional Thursday because it does not include a health exception.

I just hate the name of that act. It so clearly smacks of Anti-Abortion interference. And no, you people who are against abortions do NOT get to call yourselves Pro-Life. That’s idiocy.

Edit: Thanks Gabe for keeping me on task.

Source

WASHINGTON - The number of Americans living in poverty increased by 1.3 million last year, while the ranks of the uninsured swelled by 1.4 million, the Census Bureau reported Thursday.

It was the third straight annual increase for both categories. While not unexpected, it was a double dose of bad economic news during a tight re-election campaign for President Bush.

This man I work with saw the picture of my poodle.

He recounted for me:

Yeah, my mom had one of those. But then my mom died. The dog was 11 years old. For various reasons, my mom did not get buried until 5 days later. During that time, the dog did not move except to occasionally go outside. It would not eat or drink. So, we made the decision to put the dog down and put it in the casket with my mom.

*cries* So sad.

Boy, these Bush people just do not stop do they?

Now, they have started using the Olympics in one of their ads, and the Olympic Committee is calling for a cease and desist.

Story here.

Lying, thieving rats.

Increase the volume of your ejaculate!

SUCH prettiness.

To that I say… Not when I’m swallowing, thanks!

I remember it well.

It was second grade.

The teacher had these incredible luscious pink erasers in her desk drawer. We had icky dirty hand-me-downs that were all grey and nasty and who KNOWS if boy hands had touched them the year before or maybe someone even put their boogers on them.

So, I took a new one from th

Every fucking entry lately is about how some vets are turning on Kerry, Kerry’s War Record, Kerry was not in Vietnam THAT long, yadda, yadda, yadda.

Why not just wear a sign that says “Fuck the truth, we want Bush!”

Wouldn’t that just be simpler than admitting that the person YOU think should be commander-in-chief did not even bother to show UP? I don’t get it. I really don’t get this mentality.

And oh yeah, turns out, the Swift Boat Liars could be… oh, I don’t know… LYING?

I really did. Most of the week, I have been thinking “Oooh, I want to blog about that” and “Oooh, I want to blog about this” and yet… in the end, the only thing that sticks out is that Halcyon dyed his pubes pink. And not a docile, ooh how soft pink. A screamin’ “I am the pink you seek” kinda pink.

Wouldn’t you love to be that bold? That cocksure? That fearless? That safe in knowing that even if you dye your hair HOT pink, you will still jump out of bed in the morning and throw yourself out in to the day? And maybe even come home and dye your pubes?

I guess in my own way, I do rebellious and wild things. I defy. I DON’T dye my hair. This is not to say that if the occasion called for glow in the dark purple I would hesitate to do it that… but given my job and all that… I just let my hair go grey. It fascinates me. The colors and patterns in my hair could not be gotten from a bottle. My hair shines like liquid silver in the sun.

And yet, each time I visit the salon, they want to brown me and frost me, weave me and blonde me.

So my hair is my fuck you to the “Do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the signs” mentality we face each day.

If you get my point, how do you say HA! SO THERE! to life?

U.S. Army soldiers take cover in a fortified position in Najaf, Iraq

I think it is a photo of what it says. But I think the intent is to make people think that something might actually be happening, when, in fact, I think it is just a photo op.

Svetlana Khorkina is one of the loveliest beings on the planet. But she looks hungry.

Andy Gibb
“Girls are always running through my mind. They don’t dare walk.”

Voltaire
“To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered.”

The Kobe Bryant trial.
The news is making it sound like the girl deserved anything she got because she may have been promiscuous. Yeah, well, it is Colorado after all.

Pretty white wives being murdered
God bless Lacey and Lori, but WTF? Are they the only women who have been murdered by their husbands in the last year or so? I fucking doubt it.

Oprah on the Jury
Seriously people? Can you picture the deliberations? I adore Oprah, think she is a miracle on the earth… but seriously.

I think a kiss would have be enough.

Some days, I wake up, straight out of bed, vibrating with anger.

I scares me to feel this much desire to maim things. It’s a good thing I do not see a lot of people on days like this because I would surely say something I regret.

She helped me fix my conundrum…

so here is a pimp to go to Baby Got Blog!

And just for silliness, here is my desktop. I just sit and swoon while listening.

I am trying to make a new layout.

why can’t I get the text-align property to move my date to the right side of the blog entry?

It’s text-align:right, isn’t it?

Zach Braff’s Garden State Blog

You will learn this equation when you go there:

Fuck + Fuck = R

Pretty nifty, eh?

You may be staring at the title of this entry, thinking WTF? Has Rori gone off the deep end?

Well, you know that I live out on the lunatic fringe, but this is serious.

Dale Earnhardt Jr’s car in the Nascar race on September 5th, will have Dave Matthews Band written across the hood and the trunk!

You can even buy renditions of it here!

Wanna see it?

And this news was found at nancies.org, where you should go if you are even REMOTELY interested in Dave Matthews Band.

Am I the only one who does NOT answer my door when someone knocks?

I figure if I am not expecting anyone, I do not have to answer.

I swear some people act like “You don’t answer your door??? But someone was knocking!”

I guess I missed that part in the rule book.

I finally heard something that completely expresses my point of view.

“If there was a Democrat in the White House, and this was going on, we’d still be doing this. This is a protest. It’s a protest about the abuse of what we feel are American values. And in this case it just so happens that, yes, this is a Republican president, and yes, the proceeds will go to efforts to defeat that Republican president.”

As previously reported, Bush signed a bill for $25 Billion more $$ for war.

However, the government today states it can do nothing to stop the pharmaceutical company Abbott Laboratories from raising the price on one AIDS drug from $1.71 per tablet to $8.57 per tablet. Oh yeah, this is only for the people who get the drug in the US. Other countries do not get the price increase.

And oh yeah, the research for this drug was funded by YOUR tax dollars.

Fuck. Anyone besides me feel like we are being held hostage by the drug companies?

And yeah, I know, this is a liberal perspective. DUH!

But I think a good mystery can get severely ruined when he has to write things like:

She slithered up and down on his long, powerful pole…

Yeah, because we could not have a villain with a short, pencil dick.

Shit. It’s one of those days. I feel like weeping about everything.

Someone posted a link of a picture of a fat girl fucking a regular size man? I thought it was sad. *cries*

A friend feels like she has no friends. *cries*

Bah.
*cries*

“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we,” Bush said. “They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.”

Mer?

“With this legislation America’s military will know that their country stands behind them as they fight for our freedom and as they spread the peace,” Bush said.

Man, he really wants those military votes.

Can you imagine how many people $25 billion would feed? Or how many diseases could be researched? Or how many alternative energy sources could be tested?

Saw it on eBay.

“A vote for change is a vote for a stronger, safer, healthier America. A vote for Bush is a vote for a divided, unstable, paranoid America. It is our duty to this beautiful land to let our voices be heard. That’s the reason for the tour. That’s why I’m doing it.” - Dave Matthews

It’s an mp3 player.

In a necklace.

You want one? Watch for them here.

One of my dear girliefriends had a BEBE today!

Welcome Claire Elizabeth!

And now go get your vibes on that Yvonne have a speedy delivery as well!

Lawren made an entry about the new words that are being added to the dictionary, such as pleather and mp3.

Me? I like to know the words that are removed, so I can keep using them. One of the favorite gifts I ever received was the book:

“Mrs. Byrne’s Dictionary of Unusual, Obscure, and Preposterous Words: Gathered from Numerous and Diverse Authoritative Sources”

Me and my friend Clyde would look up stuff to call one another. He always called me a smarmy smatchet. I kind of love the word smarm and really think it should be used more.

I dare you to use the word smarm in public this week. You’ll be glad you did.

OH! The most important word I have added to my vocab this week is Bint. It’s very handy. Thank you, Gothie.

My tummy is sick. Nausea. For two days now.

But I hate to take Pepto Bismol because I think anything that makes your poo black has to be bad.

Maybe it is food poisoning from store-bought sushi in the middle of Colorado?

Somebody fix it.

Go here to read a great article written by Ron Reagan.

And since I am in a bitchy mood, I am not going to approve any comments that attack Ron Reagan personally, since he addresses that in the article.

Deal with it.

So, I was in the loo, and there was a chick in the next loo.

I was doing my thing and then I realized I had heard her flush, and stand up. Okay, that’s cool.

But then she sat back down, pulled out a wad of TP, spread her legs and started SCRUBBING that girl with that TP.

I mean it wasn’t just a wipe… it was scary vulva abuse, and I did not like it.

Please quit spamming my fucking blog comments.

Love,
Rori

Nicked from a friend on LJ, savil32

Go through the list of Bumper Stickers below…
pick the one that best describes you and put it in the comments.

Or, just fall over laughing.
Read the rest of this entry ?

I am glad my dog is black, so I am never tempted to do this:

This is beyond the pale.

I cannot believe Planned Parenthood actually thinks this is a good idea.

(nicked from a really cute scottish girl who has lots of sex)

Well, if your dentist injects something into your mouth and tells you it is okay to swallow it, you might want to ask him if it is s3men.

(spelled funny to discourage spam)

This shocker (and I do mean SHOCKER!) courtesy of the Smoking Gun and the_lady_aurora who told me about it.

I can’t stop crying today. Don’t know that is about.

Yes, I do.

There’s so much ugliness and hate in the world. I sometimes get so down just wondering if it will ever get better, or it will only go on getting worse.

I hate the war, I have made no secret of that. I wonder if it has launched us into the brink of WWIII. Now we have people holding countries hostage, and murdering people, innocents, in horrific ways.

I hate how Democrats and Republicans hate each other, it seems like. When did we lose our core? Our connection to one another as human beings? Does blogland allow us to be nastier than we would be in person?

I play on a couple of gaming sites. Some kid sent me a picture of his “alleged” friend immediately after she “allegedly” committed suicide, and called me a fucking idiot for suggesting she should contact an adult two weeks before and so should he if he knew his friend was going to kill herself. It was a disturbing photo, but I doubt it was real. It was sentiment attached.

I am a Pollyanna. I want to believe things can be better. But sometimes I am so scared, I can barely stand it.

Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ‘’Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?'’

When Mary didn’t stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ‘’God Almighty !'’ shouted Mary and the teacher said, ‘’Very good'’ and Mary fell back to sleep.

A while later the teacher asked Mary, ‘’Who is our Lord and Savior?'’ But Mary didn’t even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ‘’Jesus Christ!'’ shouted Mary and the teacher said, ‘’Very good,'’ and Mary fell back to sleep.

Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ‘’What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'’ And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ‘’If you stick that fucking thing in me one more time, I’ll break it in half!'’

So, yeah. He emailed me and made comments about how much I used to like his penis. O.o?

Yeah, it was so memorable. NOT. In fact, I recall it was kinda creepy. It curved sideways.

*shudders with the horror*

You can sleep in Britney’s Bedroom! The singer’s mother, Lynne, designed a room at the Onyx, in downtown Boston, to look just like the pop singer’s bedroom at her home in Kentwood, La.

Is it just me or is there something twisted about that?

Their esteemed TerminatorGovernor called Democrats “Girlie Men".

“If they don’t have the guts to come up here in front of you and say, ‘I don’t want to represent you, I want to represent those special interests, the unions, the trial lawyers … if they don’t have the guts, I call them girlie men,” Schwarzenegger said to the cheering crowd at a mall food court in Ontario.

I also find it amusing he was mouthing off at a fucking mall food court.

This has been a fucked week.

My psychiatrist’s receptionist was a complete bitch on the phone. WTF is with “some” people in the medical field? They seem to forget WE pay THEM.

I’m lonely. I have not yet had time to get out and play, and find some kindred souls. Hopefully soon, I will not be so fucking tired all the time and things will become more aligned.

Weightwatchers. I am joining online again. In a world of nonsensical diet fads, points make sense to me. I am going to share openly about my progress on here, in spite of having gotten comments like “Oh, no wonder you are a liberal. You are fat".

I am going to call my family to tell them I am not coming home for Thanksgiving. That should be fun. Not. $700 for a few days trip is just not worth it to me.

And besides, not so long ago, I LIVED there and no one gave a fuck, never made an effort to see me, and now that I am $700 away, it’s all like “Oooooooh, we cannot wait to see you". I don’t think so.

So yeah, I am HELLA cranky today, courtesy of bad meds and mania.

Sue me.

Mais oui!

My favorite sentence from French class?

Tu diras bien des choses chez toi!

He’s got the logging industry sucking his dick.

While he has 1/2 of America living in complete and utter faithfulness to the “War On Terror", he is busy behind the scenes raping the rest of the nation.

He is trying to make it policy that decisions regarding protected lands be made at the local level. (this is my understanding, flame me if I am wrong)

Specifically, this will affect the Sequoia National Forest, where old, living trees are in danger of being cut down to make roads.

WTF is wrong with this world?

If you want to read the whole article, go here. It’s a registration site. Use Username “everyone” and pass “thepass".

Does anyone know that site where you can go and get a password for any of these sites that require registration?

It was like a rebel movement, one person signs up and then gives the username and password out so we don’t ALL have to sign up to read the Bakersfield Californian?

I Love John.
Have I ever mentioned I love my friend John? Well, I do.

Anyway, I was just talking to him and we were making fun of commercials.

He asked if I had ever seen the commercial for Cialis.

So I started talking in the sultry voice and he said “No, not that part! The part about how if you have a four hour erection, you should see a doctor!”

So, I said “Oh yeah” and was laughing my ass off.

Then he said “The only doctor I would want to see if I had a four hour erection would be a woman doctor".

Heh.

Now I need to find him a book to read while he contemplates what he would actually do with a four hour erection.

I was thinking about this whole Low Carb thing last night.

I have decided it is another diet industry masterminded scheme.

See, now they get to all create a whole new line of…..foods, vitamins, books, etc.

Have you tasted C2? (was going to post a link to their website, but since it crashed my computer, I will spare you). The new LOW CARB Coke. It leaves an oily residual on your tongue.

I saw a commercial last night for Splenda. What the hell is it? “made from sugar” but I cannot find an ingredient list, even on their website. It shows a kid spooning about 2 tablespoons full into a drink. I see a kid with cancer in 10 years.

My sister left a Low Carb Yoplait here last weekend. So, I thought I would try it. Again, that oily, tongue coated with lard taste.

We are stupid stupid consumer sheep.

I’m just sayin’.

Sometimes I wonder if they are worth all the trouble.

Only click more if you want to read girl stuff.
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Dear Matt,

I have tried to block your IP. Yet, you keep coming back. The reason I am not approving your comments is because you are nothing but a troll. You do not even post an email address, and you are just coming here to cause arguments.

It has nothing to do with how I feel about what you are posting.

So, don’t let the door hit you in the ass. Go find somewhere else to play.

Have a Bitchen Summer,
Rori

I always love when my neighbors are fighting.

It’s loud.

Last night, they even managed to make the dishes in my cupboards shake.

I called the cops, rather than going to their door and yelling SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU SCUMMY RATBAGS!

Now I feel like I have to hide in case they come after me.

While Kerry personally does not support abortion, he still supports a woman’s right to choose.

THIS is the man I want for President. I do not want one who pushes a Christian agenda on the entire country.

And the National Right to Life committee? I refuse to even consider any of their points as long as they continue to refer to pro-choice advocates as “pro-abortion“. Well, that is not true. I refuse to consider any of their points, because who the fuck are they to say what a person does with their life? But I digress.

Vote Kerry. Liberty and justice for all.

Happy 4th, however you celebrate!

Me, I am celebrating with a renewed committment to take back the country and all that it stands for in the next election.

You can find lots of cool bumperstickers like the one above here.

I have not blogged about my trip to sanity lately. I feel like it today.
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What in the name of all that is holy are these people thinking when they name their children?

Jermaine Jackson - daughter - Jermajesty
Jason Lee - son - Pilot Inspektor (the K really helps)
Tu Morrow - daughter - Rob Morrow
Reignbeau - daughter? - Viung Rhames
Audio Science - son - Shannyn Sossamon

These poor poor children.

On the same day that I was appalled that Arnold the guvna of California was trying to kill stray pets faster, I found this inspiring article at Snopes.

Man Saves Catfish who tries to eat ball!

Doesn’t that just make you so happy? It does me. I hate when creatures of the earth are endangered by our shit.

I am having a hard time thinking of a pithy title for this entry, can you tell?

I’m just in a… hmmmmmm… what to call this mood. Anxiety with a side of depression and mania thrown in?

It’s very against my nature to keep my mouth shut, but I am trying to be very very good at work.

I am going to think of a way to work something Jewish into the next meeting… perhaps I will bring up the Jewish holidays that fall near our event.

Anyway, Fahrenheit 9/11 WILL be in this town, if only at two theaters, so that is a relief. Focus On the Family was not able to completely shut it out.

*yawn* I am boring even myself.

HEY, you! Over there with the big pregnant belly… I sent you something, did you get it yet? Huh, didja, didja?

Okay, just wanted to make sure my blog did not get stale.

Oh yeah, I opened a new bank account? $25 bucks they charged me for the fucking checks. That’s highway robbery.

I guess if you want to try to find something to be pessimistic about, you can find it, no matter how hard you look, you know?

Is it just me, or does that make NO sense?

He also said:

Well, I think one thing the American people have seen is that I know how to lead.

I spit beverage on my screen at that one.

source

Dammit all to hell.

My TV has been taken over by an evil being from another planet or something.

The volume keeps going up to the very highest level, all of its own accord.

The remote won’t stop it, it won’t stop from the panel on the front…

What the FUCK?!?!?!?!

Dammit dammit dammit fuck shit.

For the last two nights, I have had nightmares. About my deceased mom. Except in the dreams she is alive. And drinking. A lot. Like she did when she was really alive.

The dreams suck. In one dream, I spray painted her rug with purple paint, in various designs. This really impressed Topher Grace, who then wanted to have sex with me, and I did, even though I felt guilty since I am old enough to be his mother.

THEN, I was back home, dealing with the repercussions of the purple rug. My drunk mom made me start washing each purple design off the rug with a washcloth and soap.

Somehow, I was transported to somewhere else and I was dry humping David Morse standing up, mind you, and that lead to other things and then I woke up because, well, you know… and then when I tried to go back to sleep, all I could picture was my mom drinking vodka.

At least I was sated.

Here in Coloraddy, we got our share of troubles. One of them being accusations of rape and sexual harrassment at University of Colorado.

The president of that University stated that she has heard the word “c*nt” used as a term of endearment.

So, yeah. Let’s all run out and call each other c*nts now.

Flabbergasted.

I don’t make this shit up, pal.

Hi. It’s me. The one who has never read nor seen a Harry Potter book/movie.

I understand a lot of people love them, and that is okay.

But WTF is with grown people writing slash pr0n about them?

I know one woman, not a friend of mine mind you… who spends hours of her day writing this shit. Gay pr0n with Harry and Draco. Yeah, and she does this while her son and daughter play nearby. SICK!

And I am talking some nasty stuff. Stuff you do not want to think about too much. Notwithstanding the fact that it is very pedophilic.

So, forgive me for being further turned off by the Harry Potter thing.

Is there anywhere on the web where Reagan was called this while he was still alive?

Or is this one of those posthumous titles given?

You all know what I am talking about right? Those little foot thingies they give you at the stores like Shoe Pavillion or DSW, so you can try on shoes and apparently, these little things keep you from getting foot fungus or something.

Anyway, I know you come home and find one in your pocket. I now have the answer to what you should do with them.
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The President is getting off the helicopter in front of the White House holding a baby pig under each arm.

The Marine guard snaps to attention, salutes, and says: “Nice pigs, sir.”

The President replies: “These are not just pigs, these are very rare. They are authentic Texan Razorback Hogs. I got one for VP Cheney, and I got one for Defense Secretary Rumsfeld .

The Marine again snaps to attention, salutes, and replies, “Nice trade, sir.”

You gotta see these CLOUDS!!!! (click to see them, largish image)

Apparently, they are called “mammatus” clouds and were photographed in Mexico.

from the astronomy picture of the day site.

JLo, who cares?

Reagan, prayers to his family during their time of loss.

New job, OMG, could I love it more? No. Although I have to event plan an event in New York City, where I have never been, so that is a little overwhelming. Oh yeah, and London. *flops*

Anyone know where 100 people could picnic in New York City without walking a lot? Oooh, and where there is shade?

I will rant about new jobs and clothes later, but for now, I am getting to bed early.

I know many people participated in the Blogathon last year, so I am passing along this info I just learned.

Blogathon is taking a year off this year, but another site, Project-Blog, is picking up to take its place for this one year.

:)

Wayne was on Jay Leno tonight, not sure if it was a rerun, just caught it for a moment.

My first thought was….

“Man, does he look like he has had too much plastic surgery”

Second thought…

“I hope this singing sounds better as his live shows”

Third thought was remembering the first time I heard him.

I was less than 10 years old, not sure how old, but for some reason, the song Danke Schoen was playing on a record player in the house.

It was my first face to face experience with a sexual identity issue.

Because I guarantee you that recording sounds like a girl. Go listen.

Look at this album cover.

Not sure why I am blogging this. I just remember being profoundly confused.

Dear Halle,

You don’t mind if I cheat on you repeatedly and generally behave like an ass and then try to break our pre-nup so you have to support my ass?

Signed,
Scumbag
oops, I mean Eric Benet

Found at Scott’s, who got it from Kevin, who got it at the Peking Duck.

How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to replace a light bulb? Seven:

“1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be replaced,

“2. One to attack and question the patriotism of anyone who has questions about the light bulb,

“3. One to blame the previous administration for the need of a new light bulb,

“4. One to arrange the invasion of a country rumored to have a secret stockpile of light bulbs,

“5. One to get together with Vice President Cheney and figure out how to pay Halliburton Industries one million dollars for a light bulb,

“6. One to arrange a photo-op session showing Bush changing the light bulb while dressed in a flight suit and wrapped in an American flag,

“7. And finally one to explain to Bush the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.”

OMFG, this day could not be any better.

But because I only had like 1 hour of sleep last night, I have to make this short.

1. THE JOB ROCKS SO HARD I CAN BARELY BELIEVE IT.

2. Tomorrow, we all get to go outside for a catered lunch to watch the Thunderbirds Air Show which is being put on for the Air Force Academy Graduation.

3. Bush will be here. BOOOOOOO

4. Iceland is going to cut back on the number of whales it kills this year.

Okay, thanks to all for your good wishes, I sincerely mean that.

Talk to you later.

I start my new job tomorrow. 8:15 am.

I am so afraid.

They run a credit check on you, for god’s sake.

What if I get let go because I had a bill to go to collection?

I am just a jangle of nerves and fear.

Wish me luck.

My suit is ironed, and I am wearing a purple shirt for luck.

Yeah, so my second ex-husband decided to call me last night.

He had a dream about me.

A sex dream

And I had shaved my ya-ya.

And did I remember that time I shaved it for him to surprise him?

*face palm*

Why me.

Dear Self:

If you ever the head of personnel, and you lay people off on Wednesday, please make a note to yourself to remove them from your Outlook, so you do not send the corporate HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ….. email on Thursday.

Love,
Self

p.s.
Self, if you are that stupid, shoot self.

So, I have had a second job.

I just got laid off because I am being replaced by people in Singapore.

How much does THAT suck?

Why me?

Last night I had the hottest dream. I was making out with Ty Pennington in a swimming pool. It was good, it was hot, it was wet.

We make plans to meet later for more.

I go through the rest of the day in a euphoric haze. Mick Jagger was there and he made me wear a blazer to run to the store with him, but all I was thinking about was getting back to Ty.

Finally, I find Ty, meeting him in some kitchen.

He has changed.

He looks worried.

I ask him what is wrong.

He says he cannot go through with it. He says he likes me too much, but he is afraid of what I will bring to the table. I try to ask WTF he means, but he just looks sad.

I maintain my calm, instead of shouting “I just want to F**K you dammit".

We sit there and stare at each other. He is sad. I am incredulous.

I get up and leave.

Note to Ty: Next time you are in my dreams, just be a slut.
Note to self: Next time, just do him in the pool. Even if people are watching.

…to the Tin Man, that he didn’t already have.

That lyric has been my mantra the last few days. I am not sure why it popped into my head.

Maybe it had to do with going on an interview, and all the angst that goes with that.

All I know is that somehow, thinking about those lyrics, and understanding what it means really helped me walk through the interviews, believing that if what I had to offer was right, it was get noticed.

My body shape/size notwithstanding…
the color of my hair notwithstanding…
my college education notwithstanding…
and so on.

And guess what? I got the job.

I truly with all of my heart believe that if you open yourself up to the universe, and are willing to accept whatever is given to you, amazing things can happen.

and behind the extended entry… Tin Man, by America.
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*screams* That song is stuck in my head because it was the last thing I heard in the car this morning. This is a BAD thing.

I am as nervous as…a cat in a rocking chair factory, a cat on a hot tin roof… are there any dog clichés I can use?

I have a second interview tomorrow. Why does job hunting have to create so many feelings? I feel guilty, elated, worthless, hopeful. No wonder I feel like I am going to toss my cookies.

and yet happy. I got called back for a second interview on a very cool job.

I notice the Quizno Sub creatures are not on TV much anymore. Thank you God.

However the new KFC commercials make me want to vomit.

“I’m a drive-thru diva”
“Chicks for Chicken”
“It’s always ladies first at KFC”

WTF?

Is it make sure females eat chicken month?

Yes, folks, that’s right. The insomnia is back. With a vengence.

This is SO not a good thing.

Not when my daytime boss is doing stupid shit like rearranging my desk and then saying “Did you notice anything different about your desk this morning?” in her annoying voice.

Then she says “I am trying to teach you how to keep a neat desk".

This from the woman who has a post-it note affixed to every square inch of her desk and cube walls.

Me? I am of the opinion as long as I can find what I need on MY desk, then she needn’t worry her brain about it. She should focus on other things. Perhaps getting laid might relieve her tension.

Or maybe I am just guilty because I lied and said I was going to the doctor so I could go on an interview? Which leads me to my next question…

Don’t the most honest of us still need to lie to go on a job interview? Is anyone honest enough to say “Hi, I need to leave early Monday so I can go on an interview, which, if I get the job, I will be leaving here so fast my ass will just be a blur?”

Anyway, the cool trick is from Mandarin Design Daily, which if I have not said it before, I LOVE THEM.

Oh yeah, I am thinking of changing domain names. What do you think of “roried.com"?

These two are menaces to society.

I just watched last night’s episode where they ganged up and gave one couple an all black room and the other couple an all white room.

The couple with the white room cried they were so upset.

I wish they would incorporate more of the homeowners input when they are doing these rooms. It’s like an ego trip with them, and it reallys sickens me. It is not entertainment to see someone’s house ruined.

You can see the rooms here. Just know this, in the black room, it was BLACK BLACK, the photo makes it appear like it was shades of grey. No, it was black. Every single thing in the room.

May 13. Snow.

I love it!

I don’t like having to drag my cart through it to meet vendors at work though, that part kinda bites.

hump.hump.hump.hump.hump.hump.hump.hump.HUMP!

It is Wednesday, right?

Humps.

I live in Colorado, so the Kobe Bryant trial is big news.

Tonight the broadcaster said:

“Find out how Kobe Bryant pleads on the sexual assault charge that could land him in jail for the rest of his life

Show of hands please from anyone who thinks that could ever possibly happen?

*peers*

Anyone?

Yeah, sailormongering. An obscure law, on the books since 1872.

It’s this law the Justice Department is using to prosecute Greenpeace.

Greenpeacers climbed on a ship hauling illegal lumber from the Brazilian Rainforest. They carried a banner asking Bush to stop illegal logging.

The individuals who actually boarded the ship have settled their cases, and the illegal loggers were never charged with anything.

But then the Justice Department decided to go after Greenpeace itself.

This will be an important case to watch, because it seems to be nothing more than another blow against Free Speech. It is likely Greenpeace will prevail, because of the stupidity of the charge and the vague nature of the “sailormongering” law.

Nabbed this just now from Pikes Peak Cam.

Pretty trippy, eh?

The guy survived.

Damn, I miss blogging. I do try to keep as many read as possible, and be a good commenter, but I miss writing in it.

I was in Jiffy Lube today, getting my emissions test and on the TV in the waiting room, I heard how Bush went on TV to talk about how sorry he is about the torture of the Iraqis. I nearly shouted out “Yeah, sorry there were photos", but I refrained myself in time.

See, I already got told that I did not understand how things are in military time, and that one must go to great lengths to get people to confess.

Yeah, forcing someone to give someone else a blow-job is a sure conversation starter I am sure.

Oh well, I passed the emissions test, so I am off to get a new license plate tomorrow. Normally, as soon as I move, I get the new one, but this time, I have just procrastinated. But I do not have to give back my old one (one was stolen) so I guess I can make a lovely piece of art out of CA-GROOVYR.

Dentist tomorrow. Hope she doesn’t faint when she looks into the black hole of death.

As Mother’s Day approaches, I can barely stand to see all the cards in the store. It just makes me so damn sad. The grief is always fresh and like a punch in the stomach. Meh.

Lately though, I have been thinking a lot about my Dad and how much it hurts that I basically do not exist in his life. To me, if you care about someone, you let them know. You occasionally call them to say Hi, how are you?

Or in the case of dads and daughters, it would seem to me that you should be able to call and ask for advice.

But not for me.

I am starting to realize that a core of my being is the sense of loss. I do not know how to grieve something like this… something that is a fundamental feeling that will never be reciprocated. I think this rejection by my dad is at the core of my feelings of worthlessness and unlovableness. I do know that it hurts.

So, apparently dreams about chewing gum have meaning.

Here is what I learned today:

This dream suggests that the dreamer may experience frustration in daily life due to a large scale or standing insolvable problem that leaves them feeling powerless. The dream represents an inability to digest or to process information or a dilemma. It also suggests that the dreamer is not able to express him or herself effectively and that repetitive and ineffective verbal expressions are typically used.

I have this dream all the time. No matter how much gum I pull out of my mouth, there is more in there, and I pull and pull and never get it all.

I think I feel worse that I may have a “standing insolvable problem". *grins*

How about you? Any gum dreams? Teeth dreams?

Blender Magazine has named the 50 Worst Songs, at least in THEIR opinion.

You can only see numbers 41-50 on their site right now, but if that 10 is any indication of the rest of the list, they have their heads up their asses.

Here are the ones on their list that I vehemently disagree with.
THE BEATLES
“Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da” 1968

SIMON & GARFUNKEL
“The Sounds of Silence” 1965

BILLY JOEL
“We Didn’t Start the Fire” 1989

RIGHT SAID FRED
“I’m Too Sexy” 1992

There have been a lot worse songs than these. Pretty much anything from NWA belongs here, as does Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner.

I’m a loner. Sometimes I am a lonely loner.

I am kinda sad right now because my sister, not the psycho, was supposed to come visit me.

This is the second time we have arranged the trip. The first time, she bailed at the last minute because she had a hypoglycemic reaction to some food she ate.

This time, she is bailing because someone needs her to watch their dog.

Makes me feel like shit. Then she wanted to plan the trip again, and I just told her no. I don’t want to go through this again.

4:30 in the morning. No sleep yet.

“Conscientious Objector Policy Act”

Have you heard of this? It passed the house in Michigan, and it allows health-care to refuse treatment that is against the health-care providers ethical, religious or moral principles.

It also allows for insurance companies to not cover things for the same reasons.

THIS is horrifyingly frightening to me. Obviously, doctor patient privilege is out the door. This is a direct by-product of the Bush administrations Christian agenda, IMO. I will come back in a bit to post more on this, I am so pissed I am shaking.

Abortions, birth-control pills, AIDS patients, gay patients, patients living out of wedlock, black people, white people, Muslims? WHERE DOES IT END? This is not the land of the free, with liberty and justice for all.

Read this article or this one.

This is just not good! I simply MUST find time to blog more. It’s not that I don’t have fascinating things to say and trenchant observations to make, it is just that I am SO DAMN TIRED.

I am formulating a plan though. It involves moving when my lease is up. To another city. One that is not run by Christian Conservatives and one in 15 people is in the military. Not that they are not lovely people, it’s just that I do not fit in here.

Beyond that, I am excited because one of my sisters is coming to visit and we are going to cruise used furniture stores and flea markets and all sorts of fun stuff like that, and I was able to rent a mini-van (in anticipation of all the cool stuff I will find). And I get the minivan from Friday at 10 am until Monday at 8 am for the price of ONE DAY. That’s right folks… ONE DAY RENTAL.

So yeah, I am happy. I bet the GroovyMobile could use a rest as well.

Alright, my 12 hours of work for the day is over, so I have to crawl into bed and read for 1/2 hour and then sleep.

Am I a fascinating and beguiling creature OR what?

I know, I am day early.

Earth Day

But yay! I love Mother Earth!

I always like to make sure hearing people understand Deaf people a little, so please be sure to check out this story about Deaf Raves. When I lived in Oregon, I attended several concerts with Deaf friends and they would hold balloons to feel the music. Very cool.

Live Boar Cam. Self-explanatory.

How to Gag on the Passion. Includes such wonderous insight as:

This is not Christianity. This is not a message anyone needs. This is the exact opposite of spiritual progress or insight or gentle divine heat and if Jesus came back right this minute and was made to sit through this film, he would sigh gently, shake his short, shaggy hair (long hair was forbidden by Jewish law – wrong again, Mel), and, you know, hold a nice seminar or something.

It’s odd how I can hear a song, get hooked in by the tune and then listen to the lyrics later.

What I am wondering is when did it become okay to talk about making someone come (cum, orgasm, whatever) in regular top-40 radio songs?

Maroon 5 sings:

I tried my best to feed her appetite
Keep her coming every night
So hard to keep her satisfied
Kept playing love like it was just a game
Pretending to feel the same
Then turn around and leave again

Outkast sings:

(Ya’ll dont wanna hear me you just wanna dance)
heeeeeeeeeeeey yaaaa
heeey ya
(dont want to meet your daddy)
heeeeeeeeeeeey yaaaa
(just want you in my caddy)
heeey ya
(dont want to meet your momma)
heeeeeeeeeeeey yaaaa
(just want to make you comma)
heeey ya

I’m just wondering, that’s all.

…another 99 cents.

Yeah, so last night I was so bored I watched the Nick & Jessica show. It’s being touted as Sonny & Cher for the new millenium. Whoever said that is an ass.

But a couple things I noticed… they actually can sing. However, Jessica has this little seizures or something while she sings which are very unattractive. Oh yeah, and her mouth? What is up with it? It’s….. odd.

And she did a duet with Jewel. Which would have been nice, except instead of singing like herself, she tried to sing just like Jewel. I was screaming “Jess, don’t try to out Jewel Jewel!” But she kept doing it.

I guess she could not hear me.

I am SO done with hearing about Christ and Jesus and the Passion and being saved… and that’s just at my work.

Has the world gone stark raving mad?

You think not? Well, guess what. YOU are wrong, bucko.

And you wanna know how I know?

Because of this (found at Gamersnook!) That’s how.

A church trying to teach about the crucifixion of Jesus performed an Easter show with actors whipping the Easter bunny and breaking eggs, upsetting several parents and young children.

Whipping the Easter Bunny. Good lord. I am pretty sure Jesus was a good guy and I am pretty sure he looks down at this assholery and thinks to himself “They sure missed the point, didn’t they, Dad?” And then God says “Don’t talk about your brothers and sisters like that” and sends Jesus to his room.

As for me, I am going to try to ignore the Christian coalition at my work, who will be serving hot dogs and potluck tomorrow for an hour and a half luncheon for a “spirited discussion of the Passion and salvation". Because see, if they get in my face, I might have to break eggs on them. Or whip them, screaming “Easter is not about hot dogs!”

It’s true. You just go here and download your free measuring kit.

Then, you simply order by width and length. Which, BTW, is all mysteriously coded so no one actually has to order “Small” or “Thin” condoms.

Wow. Today was a first for me.

I was so tired at work, I actually went to my car and took a nap in the back seat at lunch.

0.0

Must be the emotional fall-out from being asked if I wanted the senior citizen discount yesterday.

Shoes? SO not interested in them. Comfort is key baby.

Mascara? And the point of that is what?

But the worst for me? Shopping for clothes for myself. I would rather lick the floor clean.

But today, I had to do it. I have no clothes that are appropriate for the changing weather.

I commence my drive down to the “big” mall, as opposed to the “little” mall. I spot a Ross in the distance. I pull in.

30 minutes later, I leave. Two shirts and two tank tops in hand.

Panic ensues. I power down anti-anxiety meds and continue to the mall. Buy a couple more shirts. Leave.

Come home. Sleep for four hours, just from the sheer mental exhaustion of it all.

I HATE SHOPPING. I hate everything about it. I hate being ignored by salespeople, I hate being harrassed by sales people. I hate trying stuff on. I hate seeing myself in the dressing rooms mirrors.

But today, something new happened. A mostly non-English speaking checker at Ross asked me if I wanted my senior citizen discount. *flops* WTF?

Remember those? I still have mine, and one of the military wives at work said many people are finding their vet and returning them.

I looked up the man on my bracelet, and I found this page:

Ramon Horinek and this article.

I am going to try to find more so I can return the bracelet. A teenager in Burbank, California wore it everyday till I saw he came home.

I have been pondering this issue for some time, the “under God” bit as well as the whole pledge of allegiance.

I went through a rebellious stage in high school where I refused to say it. They tried to force me, and threatened to tell my parents, but given that I was 18 and no longer lived at home (long story), the school finally just threw up their hands. And I refused to stand and pledge.

Fast forward to now. While my spiritual beliefs include the possibility that we are a nation “under God” (along with all OTHER nations), I am opposed to it in the pledge, and I support others who are. For me, I do not think it should be forced on anyone. But beyond that, I was having trouble articulating why.

Thankfully, I happened upon this article, by Marci A. Hamilton. She explains history I did not know, how the “under God” was only added in the 50s, as a bit of a “We are not COMMUNISTS” thing. As a nation, as a world, we were more naive then. I truly believe that.

What caught me most in her article is the shift of focus. The Pledge was never written to include the words under God, and by focusing on that one phrase now, we are losing our focus as a nation. The most important principles of this country are NOT about being Under God. It is about “liberty and justice for all". I support the removal of the phrase from the pledge, and thank you to Marci for her fantastic article.

*not*

This one, a gay marriage survey, is so scientific, you can vote AS MANY TIMES AS YOU WANT.

*snark*

I am not a Catholic, so I simply do not understand how comments from the Pope on feeding tubes can change the anything at ANY US hospitals. If the Supreme Court ruled that feeding tubes:

are medical treatments “never intended to keep someone alive forever in an unconscious state”

then, how can anything the Pope says change that? Seriously, this has me very concerned. So, help?

Full story here.

Yay! The princess of all that sparkles has a new toy.

And, NO, it is not a dildo. (someone actually asked me that)

These are thanks to my favorite Presidential candidate: Cyn for President!

Recently I overheard two co-workers, the first of which was training the other one.

Co-Worker #1: “A boolean variable has two possible values: true or false.”

Co-Worker #2: “Umm…true?”

and another…

A lady struck up a conversation with me on an airplane.

Her: “And where are you going?”
Me: “I’m going to San Francisco to a UNIX convention.”
Her: “Eunuchs convention? I didn’t know there were that many of you.”

At least in Georgia.

Actually, it really sounds like an idea to deal with female mutilation as practiced by some religions gone amuck.

Damn. And I was just thinking of moving to Georgia, getting both labia pierced and then running a wee golden padlock through them.

Okay, it is old, but it is funny.

God, creator of the universe and longtime deity to billions of followers, was found Monday to suffer from bipolar disorder.

Why? Because I have not watched it yet. But that does not mean that a very good friend of mine did not SPOIL it for me and tell me who was kicked off. Yanno… it may seem stupid, but I love Survivor and the Apprentice, and dammit, if you are a friend I discuss these shows with, do NOT tell me the ending when you know I have not watched it. I don’t give a rat’s ass if you were upset or happy by the ending, so stick a cork in it.

Oh yeah, Apprentice was a lame ass recap.

And no, currently, I do NOT have a life. Heh. I am getting back in the swing of working, and I am LOVING the job. LOVING it. I’ll tell you more about it another day.

And Yay, the Popularity Contest Bloggies are over!

A little wave, a he-wave, is bobbing along in the midst of the ocean having a great time.

One day he sees that he’s headed toward the shore and he realizes that he’ll soon be annihilated.

“My God, what’s going to become of me?” he thinks, and he falls into a deep depression.

Another wave, a she-wave comes bobbing along, having a fine time. She says to the he-wave, “Why are you looking so glum and afraid?”

“Don’t you know?” he says, “You’re going to crash into that shore and then you’ll be nothing!”

“Don’t you know?” she says, “You’re not a wave; you’re part of the ocean.”

Chief Visionary of Mission-Critical Content Paradigms.

What’s yours?

Heh, this ought to get me some hate mail.

A woman who refused a C-Section is now being charged with murder.

Do Christian Scientists get charged with murder when they refuse treatment for their sick children? No.

So, a woman refusing a C-Section is not murder. It’s ugly and horrific, BUT IT IS HER RIGHT.

Okay, fire away.

Yesterday I had to take my car back to the shop and wait while they figured out why the Check Engine light came back on, even though they fixed it last Thursday.

In the waiting room, the only magazine that was NOT about foreign autos was YM. (Young Miss). I was stunned to read through it.

They had a section where kids could write in about their most embarrassing moments and the staff would rate them. One of the letters was from a 14-year old who was caught at a dance with her boyfriend’s hand up her shirt. There was also one from a 16-year old who was wondering if it was okay to be “best friends with benefits” with a 20-year old.

*flops*

I officially feel old. I was barely even cognizant of sex when I lost my virginity at 17. It just seems like the kids are so sexual so early.

That’s all I’m sayin’.

Preparation H, that is.

I finally gave in and decided to try some.

Not there, you big sillies! Underneath my eyes. It’s supposedly a Hollywood Secret for removing that tired look.

All I know right now is my eyes are watering. I am not sure if any tissue is shrinking.

I feel nervous today. I start my new job tomorrow. I am very excited and believe I have a new level of gratitude and humility about working.

I have never been so broke before, but I also know that I had the strength to remove myself from a very toxic situation, and was willing to do whatever it takes. Right now, it takes two jobs and a lot of self-doubt, but I honestly have lost hope that things will get better.

I tend to be fatalistic, I take on things as if they can never change. Like this will be the last job I ever have in my whole life, and this is the last place I will ever live, and stuff like that.

It’s silly I know.

I think I am a true wanderer. I like not having roots, I like being able to leave if I need to. Maybe I am just running away from myself all the time, who knows.

But anyway, I have 11 more minutes on the computer for the day and so I best get to my chores. Thanks for listening

So some nostalgia set in, playing 70s songs, and I decided to enveil something few have ever seen,

My senior picture. There is so much backstory, but let’s just get the thing out of the way.

See an Early Version of the Rebel

To those who are wondering and writing me saying I am a hypocrite and a censor because comments does not allow the word FUCK, it is a function of MT-Blacklist.

I could give a fuck if you say fuck, but I really do not want to be spammed by goat-fuckers, or fuck-longer dot com, etc., so I am going to let Blacklist do its thing.

And seriously folks, don’t be ridiculous. Of course your posts will be deleted if you do not like Vincent D’Onofrio. *eye roll*

Anyone have any recommendations on a carpet steam cleaner? Nothing too huge or expensive, but not one of those cheesy hand helds like I bought last time, with its flaccid little brush that did nothing but spread stain further around.

Any one have any ideas, I would love them.

Thanks.

I hate them. Sometimes, mine are so vivid, I wake up crying and shaking and it takes me hours to recover.

Last night…
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Huh Corp

Don’t just stop at the first page, the whole site is funny.

Example:

We have really smart people who are always thinking up totally cool shit. We have a meeting room with a big, round, expensive table. When you hire us to do something, we spend lots of time sitting around the table having meetings.

My bed is currently nekkid.

But today between 11-2, the people will be delivering my new pillowtop mattress. *dances*

Accidentally blipped to a Christian Ministry radio station on the way to Walmart. They were discussing “the” movie.

Caller: My 11 year old is deeply faithful and has a personal relationship with Christ. She prays every day. Should I take her to the see the movie?

Radio Guy: If she is that faithful and her relationship with Christ is strong, the violence will only serve to deepen her faith.

Good grief. How about this lady? For the sake of your daughter, spend the $8, go see the movie first and MAKE YOUR OWN DECISION. Be a parent!

FFS.

I made sure plenty of you knew it was my birthday.

And still.

NOBODY GOT ME THIS.

(you need to click to see what I am bitching about)
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I recommend you listen to Vanity 6 on my radio blog while staring at this. Heh. Just click Music While You Read over in the sidebar.

Someone asked me that today.

I do, very much.

In the early 90s, I lived in Oakhurst, California. It is one of the gateway towns to Yosemite. It is approximately 45 miles north of Fresno.

Some of the people who worked with me, at Sierra OnLine, lived in Fresno. One of them was my very good friend, Robert.

One day, Robert was making the trip from Fresno to Oakhurst. Part of the road is just two lanes, north and south. Robert had a small pickup, with a shell on the back. His daughter, who was about 7 at the time, was in the back of the truck.

Unfortunately for Robert, a woman travelling southbound swerved to avoid hitting a plastic bottle that was in the road and plowed into Robert head-on. It should be noted that the southbound lane has a decline, so she was going much faster than he was.

The force of the impact sent many of Robert’s teeth flying down his throat. He took months to recover.

But this is about the angels.

His daughter was found by the side of the road. The shell had turned over, and she was in it, lying in a blanket, completely unharmed.

When he was able to ask his daughter what she remembered, she said “Daddy, all I remember is the angels carrying me over the side of the road".

And that is why I believe in angels.

First, thanks for finally getting up from your desk to acknowledge me. I realize we customers in the most expensive department in your store can be a real pain in the ass.

Second, thanks SO much for honoring the deal your subordinate put IN writing for me. I really did not need you to tell me that it would be a major ordeal for you to override the current pricing on the mattress. And that she was new and she should not have told me she could hold the price for me. Oh yeah, and I was really not amused when you asked me if I could just wait for the next sale.

One more little piece of advice for you… learn to use your register. Surely, I was not the first person ever in the history of the world to use a gift certificate and write a check on the same transaction.

Sincerely,
Rori
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This random moment courtesy of REUTERS/David Rae Morris.

The new guy may look like this, buffer and more “ethnically ambiguous", but my heart will always belong to Lumberjack Brawny Man.

This is a beautiful slide show of soldiers coming home to Colorado Springs, CO.

I support our troops.

A woman decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace.

The woman begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse’s mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse’s neck, but she slides down the side of the horse.

The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup and she is now at the mercy of the horse’s pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune the WalMart manager runs out and unplugs the horse.

by Chet and Lex.

All I know about you two after had the pleasure of being trolled by you is this:

When intelligence fails, pretentious works.

Come back when you have something intelligent to say. Till then, ciao!

Mostly this will not make sense to most people here, but I am just going to say it.

If you come to this blog and get abusive toward me, I will not stand for it, and your malarkey will be deleted.

I do not care if you disagree with an opinion I state here, in fact, I welcome a constructive debate.

But to come here and start out and out name calling, or making derisive remarks about me, THAT I will not tolerate.

I stooped to your level and I am ashamed of it. So, THAT’s over. Moving along.

You’re handsome. I’ve admired your butt. You’ve made some good movies.

But your latest shenanigans with your Christ movie are over the top. I feel bad that you are having a crisis of faith, but you gotta know you are pissing people off.

“There is no salvation for those outside the Church,” Gibson replied. “I believe it.”

He apparently even thinks his non-Catholic wife is an iffy bet for heaven. “Honey, you are good enough to be the mother of my children, too bad you’re not Catholic". (imagined conversation)

I’ve left a husband for being a republican, I sure as hell would leave one for thinking he is closer to God than I am.

But, since he is not my husband, I can just boycott him. And I will.

It’s a slot machine. It plays the Monty Python song “Spam!” Heh.

It’s a tall image, so I hid it.
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my not so good friend.

The bipolar has been manageable for a while, but it seems like I am going a little whacky again.

Maybe I am just stressing because I am worried SICK about finding a job. I always hear those people say get up, get dressed like you are going to work, and spend 8 hours looking for a job.

I don’t know how they do it. What can you do for 8 hours? Maybe I am not searching correctly or something, but… yeah. I don’t know what to do for 8 hours.

Well, it is about 4 am, this sucks. Hopefully, I can sleep soon.

Oooooh, this is better than the Penguin game!

Watch We Didn’t Start the Fire

Or, if you prefer, you can read it here.

I got $5 and I am going to see a movie tomorrow.

Should I see Mystic River or Big Fish?

Best Male Rock Vocal Performance
(For a solo vocal performance. Singles or Tracks only.)

Gravedigger
Dave Matthews
Track from: Some Devil
[RCA Records/Bama Rags]

*dances*
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!
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I was over at Patchwork Progression just now, reading about Tapatio hot sauce. Ironic, I thought, given that I had just had a hot sauce dilemma of my own!

One of my favorite meals, no laughing! is a hot dog (Hebrew National Only) sliced down the middle long-ways. Nuke for 20 seconds.

Add some sharp cheddar cheese in the slit (heh) and nuke till the cheese is melty good.
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I found this today, and am so excited I felt I must share!

To start budget yoga, you need:
–A clear patch of floor space and wall
–One bottle of white school glue
–A family pet (preferably a dog or a cat)
–A very thick book (telephone directory, encyclopedia, Harry Potter #4 or later)
–A cushion

For the rest of the steps, go here.

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Thank you for the birthday wishes. It was a fairly uneventful day. Best thing to happen was I got a new carport closer to my apartment, which made me dance with glee, and numerous arm pumps while yelling “fuck yeah, skippy!”

Birthdays can be lonely and messed up, can’t they? I swear, I will never send a birthday card late again, because it might be the only one the person receives.

And it sures beats an email late at night saying “Oh, I was thinking of you today".

/complain

Holy Crap.Lions! Tours.

You have got to go see this little cartoon:

Kenya

and while you are there, you might also want to check out…
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I finally have one! I added it to the image above.

I love it! *dances*

Have I mentioned I have a headache? AND a toothache? And the headache has been going on for a week? And I damned tired of it?

I did finally go to the doctor and screamed ‘GIVE ME DRUGS’. She gave me a muscle relaxer that puts me to sleep in minutes and sent me to a physical therapist. His techniques are quite unorthodox. He had me in a tweak position where he was practically lying on top of me and he was squishing my right boobie.

But when you have had a headache for a week, you don’t much care about the stranger boobie-squish factor.

Okay, now, I am going to take one of my pills and zonk.

WANT.

Image moved to see if I can figure out why my blog is wonking.
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I am so tired of having nightmares. And mine are horrible, life-like, never-ending nightmares.

Just the night before, I witnessed a murder and last night, I was accused of killing two people and was thrown in jail. My dad would not respond to my calls to help me find a lawyer and I was just stuck there.

There were truly truly horrible.

The thing I hate is that I wake myself up, get up, walk around a bit and go back to bed, and the SAME nightmare starts up again as soon as I go to sleep.

I literally today had to wake up and take an anti-anxiety pill just to stop shaking and crying.

It sucks.

It’s funny how some things in our life we just conveniently erase from our minds.

I had forgotten about one particular incident with my 2nd ex-husband until Mikey mentioned Vanity 6.

I used to have a lot of albums. I was (am) a Prince fanatic, and by association, I was into his various girl bands. (I did miss Carmen Electra as a rapper, but I think I can survive that)

One of my favorite albums was a solo effort by Vanity called “Wild Animal". It had some great songs on it. When Mikey mentioned it, I had to go back into the dark recesses of my mind to try to figure out what the hell happened to that record.

Then, I remembered.

When I married my second husband, he seemed like a relatively normal, albeit pretty republican guy. He never let on through our courtship that he was indeed a bigot.

One day, as I was happily spinning Prince’s International Lover, he went NUTS. He started screaming, saying the N word and scared the shit out of me. He grabbed my albums and started throwing every one of them by a black artist out into the driveway. Having come from a first marriage of violence, I was not strong enough at that time in my life to stand up to him.

Once all the albums were culled, he then went into the garage, got a sledge hammer, and proceeded to bash every one of those albums into smithereens.

Isn’t that a fucked up deal? Thank God I am not married to him any longer, although he has recently expressed regrets about our breakup. I was stunned. We were about as compatible as salt on a snail.

So, in a bitchy moment, I reminded him that I got him to vote for Dukakis, he got really pissed about it ALL over again, and now I don’t think I will hear from him anymore.

Heh. Thinking back on the album incident, one wonders why I would even want to, no?

I’m just wondering, when you look at the picture below (click more Rori to see it), do you see fashion or a torture device?
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The town I live in is very Christian. In fact, in the face of all laws to the contrary, some job postings here say things like “must be committed to the teachings of Jesus Christ". Yeah.

Needless to say, 6:30 am on a Sunday, I was the only one in the supermarket. All five of the employees working there STARED at me. I know they were thinking “she’s a heathen, probably up all night doing drugs and men".

On a happier note, PresidentMatch hooked me up with Kucinich and that is JUST fine with me. Bush was last on my dance card…. everybody say “awwwwwwww” with me now.

because if you had to use the loo while wearing this dress, you might be S.O.L. (shit outta luck). (opens in extended entry)
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I am irritated. This rant may cause some of you to think I am from another planet, but really, it is just my first winter in a cold place.

It is January. We got more winter coming, there is snow on the ground, it’s forecasted to snow some more, and it rarely gets above 40.

But can I find a pair of snow boots or a sweater or two?

Hell no. All the stores have pretty much clearanced out all the winter stuff and it’s all linen and such for spring.

I DO NOT GET IT. But then I think I am missing a couple of “girls do this, girls know this” genes. I am not ready to shop for June right now. I need some turtlenecks and Sorels and I would appreciate it if they were still in stock. I will not be ready to shop for winter in August either.

And while you are it, if I see an Easter Card on February 15, I may just start tearing them all from the racks screaming ‘NO EASTER CARDS IN FEBRUARY’ really really loud.

*bangs head on desk*

I am bummed. I interviewed for a job that I was SO beyond perfect for and they said they would let me know by Monday and……

nothing.

Thank goodness I had some work at my other job so I could not sit and wallow all day.
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If you are, then you make me swoon.

Don’t ask me why, but ever since I was 18, I have had a “thing” for left-handed men. Really. I am not kidding.

A lefty ups the “OMG, I want you!” ratio significantly.

Just the other night, I was watching Law and Order:CI, which stars one of my fantasy boyfriends, Vincent D’Onofrio. He was just being left-handed sexy all over the place…fingers through a rolodex, putting a push-pin up on a board… it was all I could do to contain myself. I literally melted inside and felt weak.

Am I the only one?

Someone ’round here needs a good ass kickin’.

It’s me.

I could kick my own ass for deleting every damn file from my directories when I had the brilliant idea to recreate this blog over from scratch.

WTF was I thinking? That I actually understand MT? Or CSS? And that I can create a new and fantastical design that makes more than zero two people want to come and stare at my blog each day?

So, I am holding on to the side of the sink, jumping up, and trying to make my own feet reach my own ass. You would think with the lovely roundness of the thing I could do this, but so far I cannot.

I went on a job interview today for a job I really want, and he said he was impressed with my demeanor.

*grins*

I can honestly say no one has ever said that to me before.

Just wait till he hires me! BWAH!

I successfully installed 2.65 from scratch. I accidentally imported all the entries as Melody. DUH.

Site is no longer skinnable, but who cares. Somehow the thrill of that wore off after I saw that the folks who made mine skinnable changed to an easier method.

I am not that complicated. When I make a new skin, you will see the default. Period.

Okay, off to try to fix some of the quirks. YAY!

There is just something so fundamentally wrong with this story.

Levi Strauss & Co., the California Gold Rush outfitter whose blue jeans are a globally recognized symbol of America, closed its last two U.S. sewing plants Thursday.

Happy Birthday #57 to David Bowie! Could he BE any hotter?

And one cannot forget that this is the day that Elvis Presley was born.

What a contribution these men made, not only to music, but to our culture.

I love new babies.

Congratulations to Kate Hudson and Chris Robinson on the birth of their son, Ryder Russell Robinson!

Much love!

It went better than the first.

I have really had to wrestle with myself and pray for humility and patience, and at the same time not beat up on myself.

I have to really strive to remember that this job is NOT my life, is NOT the rest of my life, I am NOT stuck here, and I am NOT stupid because I am working as an administrative assistant.

I need to focus on staying kidney-healthy, managing my mental health, taking care of a special needs dog, perhaps even having a life in there somewhere.

It is all going to be okay.
It is all going to be okay.
It is all going to be okay.

1: Start out going East. 0.0 miles Map
2: Turn LEFT. 0.0 miles Map
3: Turn RIGHT. 0.1 miles Map
4: Turn RIGHT. 0.3 miles Map
5: Turn RIGHT. 7.8 miles Map
6: Turn RIGHT. 0.0 miles Map
7: Turn LEFT. 0.0 miles Map

Heh.

but it is truly just a ponder.

My heart and prayers go out to the victims and families of the plane crash today near Egypt.

One thing I always wonder though is the stressing of the “the passengers, including children".

Does that somehow make this a worse tragedy?
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So, yesterday, I got a placement from the temp agency! So I am employed as of Monday! Maybe it was the haircut, it set the universe on its ear?

But now, I am panicking. It is snowing like a bad dog. I am such a weenie, I have not really driven in snow since the 80s.

PLEASE tell me it is going to be okay.

Had a quiet nite myself, actually worked from 11pm to 1 am.

I did however get a chance to run outside at midnight and watch the fireworks which are shot off the top of Pikes Peak. THAT was really nice. Brave souls that go up there to do that! (summit is approx 14,000 feet)

Got my hair cut today by a professional. LOVE it. It reminds me of a sixties rocker cut. Sorry for the blur.

So, I was wondering about reading Piehole’s blog and she mentioned that her boss said “Good Morning, Gorgeous” to her.

It made me think back to my last boss. Man, this guy was such a boob looker. But he did in like a 15 year old kid. VERY BLATANT. And creepy.

A boss before him was an asslooker. And commented to other men that were my peers about my ass, and they thought that I would find it amusing.

Um, no?

Although, he did have a big package, looked like to me. I guess I have a double standard.

Now, if only I could get a visit from a cunnilingus fairy like she did, I would be able to sigh contentedly.

Does that seem overly dramatic?

Job hunting is a daunting and terrifying task.

I need some positivity.
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The real Rori.
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I thought I was depressed before.

This is the big kahuha.

I just want to go to sleep and never wake up again.

There has been some talk and spectulation on other blogs about how much our government did or could have done to prevent the events of 9/11.

Since I am such an analytical freak, whose brain never shuts off and always takes things to the next level…

I need to do the same here.
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It’s late, but I wanted to watch the Oprah show. It was the one where she goes to South Africa and takes all of the children clothing and books and toys.

I often feel impotent in life. It’s like the more I know, the more scared I am. I love America, and I love what it stands for. I do not necessarily agree that our government always has an altruistic motive for what they do, i.e., war, and I worry about the other countries in the world where people are truly suffering.
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*image copyright neopets.com, used with permission*

Yeah, this is the leader of the free world talking:

Asked whether the exclusion of those countries from bidding on construction contracts violates international law, Bush said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about by international law. I better consult my lawyer.”

This is just something weird I think about sometimes.

Suicide. Is it really selfish?
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So, I was visiting Oscar, (who by the way does not blog nearly enough to suit me) and reading his post about some dude who opines that bloggers should not blog about themselves. (I am purposely using the word blog a lot in defiance of his rules)

Anyhooo… Oscar posted one of his weird quirks, and I am inspired to do the same. I am, if nothing else, an Aquarian, which makes me a rebel and so I feel compelled now to blog about myself.

When I am working, and I use a PC not a Mac, and the open windows show up in the status bar, I have to have them in an exact certain order. Outlook first, Metapad second, any Mozilla windows next and then IE. I will shut down everything to get them in the correct order.

Now you know.

Oh, and in further defiance of the rules, my dog Paisley is doing fine as well. I have refrained from purchasing her any reindeer ears, but there are still several shopping days till Christmas.

Ugh, it is one of those days where I do not want to get out of bed.

I have that crushed feeling, that feeling of being surrounded by darkness that is suffocating me.

I think this year the holidays will be hard. This is the first one I will be alone since the death of my mom and it is pretty painful.

Meh.

I saw this on someone’s blog, but I lost it in the back button! If it’s YOU, you can tell me and I will give all credit to you.

Using a website of your choice, you can go here, type in the URL and voila! A screenplay.

Here’s a snippet from mine:

ONE WEEK LATER

MEG RYAN and ONEGIRLSLIFE.COM are shopping for new crockery. A message comes over the loudspeakers.

MEG RYAN
What did that just say?

ONEGIRLSLIFE.COM
I can only think they thought with T gone, they might be safer?

MEG RYAN
Really? This large department store’s management decisions are questionable at best.

She looks up to see RICHARD GERE standing there. He is the manager of the department store.

RICHARD GERE
Hello, MEG RYAN. Perhaps you could offer me advice on how to run my store.

MEG RYAN
I don’t think so, RICHARD GERE. I took an instant dislike to you when we first met.

ONEGIRLSLIFE.COM
Apparently, he is “A sensitive artist with a passion for life".

MEG RYAN
Yes, ONEGIRLSLIFE.COM, good point. So you see, RICHARD GERE, we can never fall in love.

Ooooh! No one told me that Ken can look like this!

Man, is they had HIM when I was little, I would not have had to make my sister’s Barbies do sapphic things.

And the “Modern Circle” version 2003 Ken?

Um, no. I don’t think so. Apparently, he is “A sensitive artist with a passion for life.”

Give me Harley Davidson Ken!

Good grief! I have been having trouble sleeping, so last night I took 2 Tylenol PMs. I could not even wake up today! Knocked me on my butt! and thirsty? Like a herd of cattle in a desert in summer!

I don’t like those.

Currently: 9º
Feels Like: -9 º

Heee! I so need to shop for warmer clothes!

Dear Johnny…
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Isn’t there some rule in the military about all the children in the same family being drafted or sent to war? My mind is telling me there is… so if I am insane, feel free to let me know.

Shouldn’t the same thing apply to husband/wife soldiers?

There is a female soldier in Colorado Springs who was/is threatened with disciplinary actions that would have affected her veterans benefits. She refused to return to Iraq, so she can stay home and care for her seven (7!) children. Her husband is already there.

Since I do not know if the link will stay, I am reposting the article in the extended entry, with all respect and love to gazette.com. Article was written by John Diedrich.
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I question my reactions to things sometimes. I bet I would fail one of the Emotional Quotient tests. But anyway, here is what happened…

I work remotely from home for an online site.

The site went down to a server failure on Sunday and Monday….
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Bwah! I just found this on my old website! I wrote it in 1999.

Saving for Posterity.
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I was perusing Prevention magazine, thinking how much it has changed (not for the better) when an article in the “Healthy Woman” section called “Infernal Itching” caught my eye.

(hey, I read anything and everything)

The topic is whether or not vaginal itching is always a sign of infection. Basically, they say no, and list some of the causes.

One of the causes is antibacterial soap. Fine, IMO, everyone knows that antibacterial soap is the devil and using it “down there” would be bad. It’s the next sentence that caught my eye.

“If you must use soap…” Say what? If we MUST? What are we to do, just splash some water on the yaya and say “Okay, good to go!” I think not.

But the insanity did not end there.

After listing some gentle soaps, this article says “If the itching does not subside in 4-6 weeks, speak to your doctor".

WTF? Four to six weeks? Yeah, I am going to walk around with vaginal itching for 4-6 weeks? Have these people EVER had such an itch?

I just thought that was really weird.

I actually forgot I had a photo blog. That just goes to show you how absent-minded I am.

But, I am going to start putting pix in it again, even if they are random.

So, check it out if you want.

edit:
all gone.

Just because I LOVE her!!!!
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I really do. You deserve to win a best Female Act award.

But this picture of you and your award is just wrong.

Sometimes, my dreams are so vivid they scare me.
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It’s on again!

Yahoooo, this time, I am doing, and nothing can stop me. *dances*

Congratulations to Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe on the birth of their son Deacon!

And

to Sir Paul McCartney and Heather Mills on the birth of their daughter Beatrice Milly!

One Girl loves to report about babies!!!!!!

I cut my own hair!

I just put it in a scrunchy and hacked away at it! LOL LOL!

I feel so free, like I broke a very big rule!

Not sure if I want one, or want to be one, but OH MY!!!!

Julian McMahon in case you did not know.

Why I believe I have been spammed in my snail mail box!

I got this today in the mail!

Now given that I live in a military town, perhaps they are trying to recruit me?

Enigmatically, all it says on the back is “I’ll be waiting for you! There’s more to see” and that my special bonus video is here with her.

Damn. I wonder who sold them my name.

Phoons!

I love this one at Trees of Mystery! I could barely find the Phooner!

I have been here two months! I can hardly believe it!

I still do not have my driver’s license. I have to get a certified copy of my birth certificate, and to get that, I need a notarized copy of a form. So, finding a notary has not been a high priority.

I have faced many challenges and learned many lessons here. My biggest lesson to date was learned today.
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I’ve been waiting for this.

See my mountain (heh) live at Pike’s Peak Cam.

I used to think I was pretty good at these kind of “What’s wrong with this picture?” puzzles, but I did not do very well on this one.

But it was fun!

Found at Jennifer’s!

I am finding that creating sacred spaces in my home makes me feel happier. This is my candle montage and my Broadway Cares snowball, from the year 2000. See the Twin Towers with their party hats? Kinda sad.

Finally, something in my comments that is not spam.

Brian apparently thinks that the Hummer Tax Loophole IS fair.

The ‘Hummer Tax Break’ simply makes up for the unfairness of the current tax system against the rich.

Horseshit! Brian, I am 100% for a tax system that is fair, preferably a flat rate. I am against loopholes, and I am most certainly against the misuse of tax-breaks, which, IMNSHO, is what Hummer owners are doing.

That tax break was “INTENDED” for farmers and ranchers, not for doctors, lawyers, governors. Don’t even get me started about how ridiculous Hummers are.

As for my letter to my pharmacy… Just because I think Pharmaceutical Companies are the devil does NOT mean I don’t need medication now and again.

Oh Mickey, you´re so fine, you´re so fine,
you blow my mind, hey Mickey, hey Mickey!

Hey Mickey !
You´ve been around all night and that´s a little long
You think you´ve got the right but I think you´ve got it wrong….

oh, um, sorry, I don’t know what came over me. Honest I don’t.

May I strongly recommend that you run out and purchase his solo effort, Some Devil?

The bonus CD is to die for, he is live. Seek Up makes you feel like you have died and gone to heaven, I swear.

I upgraded Newzcrawler and lost all my links, and now nothing pops up in Autodiscovery. Rat bastards. It probably has something to do with Zone Alarm that apparently I am too stupid to figure out.

I recorded Survivor but did not watch it, so I will remark on it later.

I think I am going to cut my hair to shoulder length. All of a sudden I am sick of it. I feel like I either need to cut it shorter, so I can leave it au naturelle. I am feeling witchy with long greying hair.

Whoever invented Bras should be shot.

Supermarkets should NOT play love songs over the P.A. Like I need to hear “Is this burning an eternal Flaaaaaame” as I am picking out cereal. No. Perhaps if I burst into tears and started screaming “Hubert, Hubert, where have you gone, this is our song!!!!” and singing along at the top of my lungs they would get a hint.

U-scans in supermarkets are very temperamental and bitchy. I tried it tonight and it just kept saying “Put the item in the bag. Put the item in the bag. Put the item in the bag."… the fucking item was in the fucking bag.

Yeah, I want that job, being the cashier who watches all the idiots being fucked with at the U-Scan.

Why do men get excited to hear Halle Berry has separated from her husband? As IF you ever have a snowball’s chance in hell of meeting her, let alone dating her? But then again, women say “Oh what a waste!” when learning a leading man is gay. We be freaks.

I am glad the boobie blog thing is closing down early. I hate it.

Candy corn is the devil.

I TOLD you I was bitchy, ne?

Wish you were still here.

My gosh, Uma is so beautiful.

Wow. I found this today on Beliefnet.com when I was taking a meme on someone else’s blog.

I love this!

Heal my wounded heart.
Grant me the courage to change my heart.
Let Peace live in my heart.

Fill me with compassion for those suffering in war.
Help me care for those in war.
Help me bring Peace to those in war.

Help me stop wars.
Help soldiers stop wars.
Help leaders stop wars.

Fill me with Peace and Justice.
Help me to work for Peace with Justice.
Let there be Peace with Justice among all peoples

source: World Conference of Religions for Peace

Insomnia bites. Couple that with cabin fever and you get a wild woman.

I am, no matter what else happens this week, going to the employment agency. I have got to get a real job where I get up and GO to it each day.

The job I have now would not be so bad were it not for the wage, or lack thereof. *grins*
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I am trying really hard not to beat myself up right now.

I get into panic mode… stuff like “OMG, I have lived here a month already and this has not happened or that has not been done".

I wish I knew how to think positively, or glass half fully, instead of everything being in the crapper.
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In my never-ending quest to learn how to keep a tidy living space, I decided to investigate Swiffers once more.

As you know, I hate Swiffer Dusters.

But the whole Swiffer Wet thing intrigued me. Well, what do I find out today? You can buy one of the regular Swiffer duster thingies and use WET cloths on it.

No one told me that! I have been suffering alone.

I hate Wednesdays. No, that is not true. I hate my new schedule.

I have Tuesdays and Thursdays off. It bites. I so need to get another job. I have been working in the 9-5 world for too many years, and I like my two days in a row off.

Oh, but today at work was fun, I had a woman older than I am “tell” on me. She actually said that. “I told on you!” I nearly fell over.

Then, when I confronted her about it, she said “Well, if the boss had not called me right then to talk to me, I would not have done it".

FFS! (my new favorite acronym, means For Fuck’s Sake) We are all grown-ups. If you did not understand something I said, then ask! Her excuse? “I took what you said personally". Well, wah, wah, wah.

People and Me? We do not get along so well.

I had heard of the Hanky Code for determining sexual orientation and fetishes, but this is my first glimpse at the Christian Hanky Code.

Harumph. I am so jealous.

This girl I know just got hired as the personal assistant to a big rock and roll star.

I am so happy for her, but damn, I wish it was me.

That’s how long it has been since this kidney stone fiasco started.

It still has not passed, I just took two vicodins.

WHEN???????

If you have a Michaels near you, I recommend you run there and snap up some of their Pumpkin candles. The scent is to die for and they are only $1!

Truly scrumptious.

It amazes me how much the standard of what is sexy and what is a beautiful body has changed through the years. Take this vintage picture from the 20s.

Contains Nudity

I think she is perfectly lovely, but today, she would be fat. Such a shame.

I just had one of these. Isn’t it so cute? The jelly beans are eggs!

Yeah, I am working, yeah, I am bored. So what? Just look at the candy and go “oooh, ahhh” okay?

I was over at Christine’s and she was flashing back about perfumes.

The first scent that I can recall wearing was Musk Oil. (that does not date me or anything)

For many years, I used Skin Musk. It was the muskiest of the musks available as I recall.

Today, my signature scent is Shalimar. I love it. I never grow tired of it and I think I like it because it is a classic.

My second favorite is Must de Cartier. That would be my signature, except it is so very expensive.

Anything else turns on me and ends up smelling like PlayDoh.

A spider web, covered with early morning water drops, illustrates the beginning of autumn weather in Switzerland. STEFFEN SCHMIDT, AP

It’s funny. I am in the transition between looking back on the last couple of years with horror, and looking at them as one of the greatest gifts I have received in my life.

While I am still working through some of the stuff with my sister, and the pain and betrayal related to that, I am starting to be able to look at the sum of the experiences and see how much they have moved me forward.
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Damnit, how long is it going to take for this kidney stone to get through me?

I just took a 2nd Vicodin, not something I normally do, but OW! I hurt!

Oooh, I cannot wait for a special occasion so I have an excuse to try this restaurant in Manitou Springs!

It’s called Mona Lisa Fondue. It says it is a “four course experience".

The Seafood Entree is the one that has me intrigued:

Try the freshest Rockport Lobster tail, Yellow Fin Tuna, Chesapeake Bay Scallops, Large Gulf Tiger Shrimp, and Atlantic Salmon; prepared for grilling at your table and served with over six gourmet dipping sauces.

Although, the Chocolate Fondue dessert is making my mouth water, even as we speak!

Our finest chocolates, warmed and perfectly blended to smoothly accompany a variety of freshly baked cakes, cookies, marshmallows and fresh fruit.

Hmmm. *grabs calendar to find a reason to go*

I lust for words.

Does anyone know if there is any kind of plug-in or link or something that I could use to get a new word each day on my blog?

Yes, I am lazy as well, so I want it to happen automatically.

Anyone?

Well, I guess if she could sing, she would not have to pose like this in Rolling Stone.

She might as well just do Playboy and get it over with.

*sigh*

and I need to use the loo.

(discussions of bodily functions follow)
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Her very own tiara.

*giggles*

Well, last night I had my first ride in an ambulance.

At about 2 am, I was suddenly struck with enormous pain. I did not have a clue what was wrong, but it felt like an organ exploded.
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Christian Bale has been selected to play Batman in the newest Batman flick!

Not sure who he is? Click here for Pic.

He is such a good (and underrated, imnsho) actor.
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Oh my gosh!

I think I have died and gone to heaven!

Scrabblog!

Thanks, Jennifer!

I am so inspired by Scott and Kim’s success in their quest for healthier bodies, I am going to go get me a scale.

Yes, I belong to WeightWatchers online, and I find that if you do not have a scale, it is really hard to track your weight.

D’oh.

But I know I have lost weight since the move and this is largely due to the fact that I do not have a microwave. I decided when I moved that I was not going to buy one, since all that Lean Cuisine crap tastes like eating raw chemicals, and there is such a small selection that contains no meat.

But since I am so used to instant-gratification food, I am struggling to remember how/what to cook. So, I am going hungry. LOL.

Last night’s dinner? An avocado. Heh. So, if you have any ideas for cooking for one, please feel free to let me know. Oh yeah, no meat.

So, what DOES one do when one gets a random person emailing you asking you for your picture?

Well, first he wanted to know if “one girl” was real, and now he wants my picture.

And he sent it from his work!

What to do, what to do.

Today, finally, my washer and dryer arrived. Yay! So, I have already done a load of towels and I am happy! *bounce*

The other good news is that I found Diet Squirt here. *flops* I have looked for that all over the place in L.A.

Now, if only I did not have to work today. *sulk*

Like A Comet
Blazing ‘Cross The Evening Sky
Gone Too Soon

Like A Rainbow
Fading In The Twinkling Of An Eye
Gone Too Soon

Shiny And Sparkly
And Splendidly Bright
Here One Day
Gone One Night

Like The Loss Of Sunlight
On A Cloudy Afternoon
Gone Too Soon

Like A Castle
Built Upon A Sandy Beach
Gone Too Soon

Like A Perfect Flower
That Is Just Beyond Your Reach
Gone Too Soon

Born To Amuse, To Inspire, To Delight
Here One Day
Gone One Night

Like A Sunset
Dying With The Rising Of The Moon
Gone Too Soon

Gone Too Soon

As I prepare to start stalking the businesses here in hopes that one of them will pay me some money to do things for them, I read about the new breed of interview techniques being used by such companies as Microsoft.

While I hate questions like “What are your weaknesses?", I am not certain I would love algebraic questions much more.

Example: If you have a fishbowl with 200 fish and 99 percent are guppies, how many guppies do you need to remove to get to the point where 98 percent of the remaining fish are guppies?

I think I better run buy this book as recommended in the NPR article.

Today I had to be on hold with SBC for about 40 minutes before I even spoke to a human.

Then, when I finally did get a human, he had to transfer me to the right department, where I was again, placed on hold.

The weird nightmarish part comes in when the employee who transferred me decided to stay on hold with me. Sometimes he talked to me, bragging about how he has an 8-track system and it is “really cool, foo” and he is going to get a lot of money for it tomorrow at his yard sale. Then, he seemed to forget I was there, and he kept burping.

It was just charming.

I wait around all afternoon for the Sears Delivery guys to deliver my washer/dryer.

They were due between 2:45 and 4:45. It’s now 5:25 and they call to say they cannot make it today.

WTF? *kicks them*

That is how I feel. Empty-headed. I still am not really fully accepting that I am here, that I am free, and I can spread my wings and fly. I tend to do that though, wait for the other shoe to drop.

The bank I opened my account with decided to put the check on hold because the “supervisor” thought it was from Canada. Yeah, Burbank, CA = Canada. Some of these people have apparently never known anyone from another state.

It pretty much fucks me up as far as paying rent, but I will open a can of whoopass on them tomorrow. Never fuck with an ex-banker.
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A new sexy skin is up. It’s one from before, I just had to redo it to make it ready in this skinning system. I set it as default.

Party on.

I now own appliances. Two of them. One washes, one dries.

I have never owned my own before. I feel so, so mature.

Got my sister off to the airport this morning. I cried and cried and cried saying goodbye to Luna, her 8 month old puppy. I will miss that puppy a lot.

Then, I had to come home to work. First day back in a week, and the damn cable goes out. I am not sure I like cable internet, I think I am going to go back to DSL even though earthlink majorly pisses me off.

I am still getting used to being here, to being fully in my own life, alone, without familial interference.

I think there are going to be some things here I have trouble getting used to, like the radical christian right, who talk on the radio about the homosexual agenda to change the US Constitution with their talk of same-sex marriage.

*sigh*

Maybe that is why I am here, to raise a little hell. *giggles*

I am here! Beautiful Colorado!

I finally sort of have internet connectivity, which is supposed to improve by Monday, so I will write more then!

I have missed everyone!

*Mwah*

See you all in a few days!

Today is my nephew’s 23rd birthday. I have not laid eyes on him since he was about 5.
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After our first long day of driving, we will either stop at the Green River, Utah Motel 6 or the Grand Junction, Colorado one. Depends on how well we are doing, I guess. One is about 10.5 hours in, the other is 12. I am hoping for the 12 hour one, so we only have 6 hours left the next day.

Hey, maybe if I am feeling REALLY geekish, I will find a Kinko’s and post!

Comment in every blog on my blogroll, and then post a “See you in a few days message".

It’s down to the wire with the move! I had a dream I got to Colorado and had forgotten my monitor. That was no fun.

I shudder to think how much spam I will have when I log back in. *shudders*

I am very tired. I am almost completely packed, and ready to load up the moving truck next Sunday night.

I rearranged the truck return time so I can do some thrift store shopping prior to returning it. THAT should be really fun! *bounce*

For now, just some stuff that made me smile.

Judge sentences offenders to tai-chi class.

Rubik’s Cube Online - heck, I could not even do it in RL!

Elephant throws rock at car

This is going to be my new view.

I’ll have to get one of Burbank for you tomorrow, so you can compare.

Thank heavens I am moving from Burbank!

Look at what my WeatherPixie is wearing!

Nicked from Christine.

God used Windows.

and, as Christine warned… no liquid in your mouth while viewing.

then this is for you.

January 3?

10 years after me? Proceed.
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My ex-husband sent me this.

ANDY ROONEY’S VIEW OF WOMEN OVER 40

Andy Rooney says…. “As I grow in age, I value women who
are over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

An over 40 woman will never wake you in the middle of the
night to ask, “What are you thinking?” She doesn’t care
what you think.
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Spoiler Protected.
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My gosh, I spent Tuesday in an emotional black-out. I have never had something like that happen to me before.

With all the stuff going on about Paisley, my dog, and getting barraged from all sides with unsolicited opinions, I think I just went into some kind of blank space. I swear I do not remember who I talked to, or anything.

It’s really kind of scary.

Britney and Jennifer with talk shows?

I Spy someone who thinks they are far more interesting than they really are.

This is a very very very hard thing I am asking about. It concerns my dog.
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Gabe @ Cranial Spew was talking about the fine time he had at his ten-year reunion.

It got me to thinking about mine.

*insert Wayne’s World wiggly hands and go deedooolloeeddeeeedddlooooo*
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You know, WWJD bracelets are good. They are wonderful to inspire you and keep you on the path to righteousness. The other day some guy bumped into me and I felt like screaming at him then I saw the WWJD bracelet around my wrist so I did what Jesus would have done. I lit him on fire and sent him to hell.

Bath and Body Works sent me an awesome coupon. It was buy $100 worth of products, get $50 off. *jaw drops*

And my sister and I had a gift certificate from there!

So, for $10 at the end of everything, I got:

Lavender & Vanilla Pillow Mist
and FIVE Bubble Baths:
Night-Blooming Jasmine
Coconut Lime Verbena
White Tea & Ginger
Moonlight Path (mostly lavender)
Warm Vanilla Sugar.

I feel like such a chick!

Oh, and I got a Apple Pie Truffle at Sees.

At Launch.com, you can now view the Mariah Carey video of “Bringing On the Heartache", originally performed by Def Leppard.

Olivier Martinez from the movie Unfaithful is her costar in the bed scenes.

I like it. Props to Mariah. With that voice, it is hard for her to do anything badly, I think.

I wish I owned this painting.

It is so haunting, yet the girl reminds me of me.

Mark Ryden’s art is fantastic.

I went to the doctor today, just to stock up on some refills in case I move, which I still not know if I am doing, in fact, I do not even know if I will have a job tomorrow morning, so things are kind of nuts…

But…

what gives a doctor the right to think they can allow you to schedule you for a 3:30 appointment and not call you in until 5 pm?

And then, stick their head in and ask if you mind waiting while she gives a patient who came in after you priority because he is having surgery tomorrow?

Luckily, I was feeling bitchy and said “Yeah, I do mind. Just write me the prescriptions and I will be out of your hair".

Bah.

Deleted.

Jen at theverybigblog pointed me to this lovely story, about the love of a boy and his…

cabbage.

I was giggling like a little girl. Check it out.

Wow. Life has sure been hectic, confused and upside down the last few days.

I literally do not know which end is up!
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Till Blogathon!

Well, actually, only 7 more hours!

Come visit me there, I will be trying to make the rounds as well!

My Blogathon Journal

One thing I like about blogs is that people post their random surf finds for me.

In that spirit, I pass these along.

Test your typing speed online - I SUCK at typing tests.

25th Annual Mooning of Amtrak - They should make this a charity event, like Blogathon. Get sponsored to moon!

:)

Well, today there has been an unexpected change in plans. So much for lofty ideals and fearlessness.

*sigh*
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I have been quiet on the Kobe thing because I am speechless that people have already decided that he is not guilty because he is on their favorite basketball team.

However, some idiocy has crept in that I must comment on.

People are making the stupidest comments out there in blog land, e.g., “What an idiot! Have you seen his wife?” as if the adultery would be condoned if his wife was not a beauty.

Or “He did not rape her because he could get anyone he wanted". Shyeah, because rape is about sex.

Assholes.

I am a week behind on my blogs.

Oh sure, I pop in here and leave some fascinating tidbit for you, my two readers to enjoy.

But there is a HOST of blogs I love reading and I have just not been able to get to it this week.

Tonight that changes. As soon as I am finished watching the Boomtown rerun, I will stay here all night if that is what it takes.

I miss you guys. *cries*

and spending a moment in silence.

I have made the decision to move to another state… Colorado to be exact.

Have I ever mentioned how much I hate Los Angeles? I hesitate to say I hate California because there are some lovely parts of it. Too bad the northern part cannot become a separate state.
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“No matter who says what, you should accept it with a smile and do your own work.” ~ Mother Theresa

I need to keep repeating this to myself today.

I have the weirdest things happen sometimes. I swear I am a little bit psychic.

Last night, this guy I used to work with figured prominently in my dreams. (nothing sexual, get your minds out of the gutter!)

This morning I woke up very puzzled about this, as I have not thought of him in months.

Then I remembered… it is his birthday today!

I just thought that was weird.

Oh my. Sometimes I wonder if life will ever NOT be painful.
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I hate hot weather. I especially hate hot weather when you live somewhere that the news pretty much says “Try not to breathe tomorrow, the air is unhealthful".

And yet more asshats are running out to buy Hummers.

I’d like anyone to give me a good reason that anyone needs to drive a Hummer.

I go to the therapist today and I am in a bad mood. Maybe that is a good thing.

This is definitely a “who fucking cares” kind of day, so I will come back later.

I love that word. Bah.

I am also very found of Gah. Or GAAAAAHHHHH!

Lately, I have not been feeling so well. Bah.

Want to see your site, in 1998? Check out the Fulifier. I was LMAO, it is so right on.

Shred your site. Or a site you hate.

Get a new name. Mine is Contessa of Man-Phylum Love, Rori van der Greely.

Make your own Evil Clown face!

And last but not least, create your OWN Mondrian.

Things just got hot around here.

Krispy Kreme Doughnuts Traditional Cake Doughnut = 5 points.

If I want, I can save my points and have TWO of them per week.

Oh, life is sweet.

Work - God, I am so frustrated. And because I am always trying to be such a good little girl, I am starting to feel backed into a corner.
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another $35 bucks.
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Rambling that is.

I am feeling a little high from the medicine they gave me to help me sleep, so like any good child of the 60s I am enjoying the buzz for a while. It sure is hard to type.

Had a big wake-up call today. I have a friend named Sue. We were best friends from 1-7 grade, inseparable. Our family lives were very different. Mine was hell, hers was as normal as normal could be. Oh sure, her family has it share of shit, but at least the daddy was not molesting the little girls.
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especially on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

But there is no way I can imagine myself doing this!
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I truly hope all of you are having a great weekend. Me? I’ve just been working.

Yesterday was a hoot because the neighbors had a garage band for their bash. My heavens, they were bad. They sung Beatles tunes, John Mellencamp songs, but the worst had to be their renditions of Hall and Oates. GAH!

“But your kiss, your kiss is on my lips”
Cowbell: Clang, clang, clang, clang!

I felt like screaming over the fence “Pick a decade and stay there!”

Well, I am back to logging my points on Weight Watchers.com online.

I did this once before and lost 10 pounds so fast it made my head swim.
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Well, it is the first day of the last half of 2003.

I know I am getting older because I say stupid things like “Wow, I cannot believe we’re halfway through the year already”

and yet…
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The 26 Things International Photographic Scavenger Hunt started!

*bounce*

to ye goode olde therapiste.
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@ Christine’s - Women Dig Girl on Girl Action

Apparently, a new study shows that women become sexually aroused by both genders. (I will refrain from commenting on the #1 male fantasy at this time)

Perhaps this beautifully photographed book “Women by Women” will help YOU decide? (small gallery here)

Just taking a walk down memory lane here…
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Christine had this cool thing where you can enter your URL and see what ads Google would run on your site, based on it’s content.

Here at OneGirl’s Life, our ads would be for the Peace Corps, Habitat for Humanity, Donate to Charity and American Cancer Society.

Fascinating.

NastyBastard made a list of the Top 10 Celebrity Women he finds irresistible. Here’s mine.

Rori’s Ten: (only numbered to keep count, order of preference may vary on any given day)
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I saw my therapist last Tuesday.
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in the saddle again!

Thank you so much to Blog Moxie for helping me get this site really skinnable!

It is so much dreamier than I could have ever imagined. I am so excited I can barely stand it. Joelle and Kathy, you guys ROCK!

*loud applause*

I played around with it a bit and have two working skins… the default red one and Oops, Gum! which is the one my sister Princess loves the best. I did it for her.

As a person who knows American Sign Language, but not yet an interpreter, like Shanni, I am always interested in advances made to promote sign.

The Cafe Signes has opened on the Left Bank in Paris. 45 deaf employees and help for hearing people who do understand sign. I LOVE it. Wish I could go.
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I am sorry your mother is not here to tell you.

I haven’t been posting because there is some stuff happening behind the scenes here, thanks to BlogMoxie, but since I think they are asleep, be verrrrrrrrrry quiet and maybe I can catch up a little.
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I am still here, I am just undergoing some tweaking.

be back soon.

Oh, I am so excited! Two good things in one day.

BOWIE on Tour. *faints*

&

Oprah is bringing back her book club, focusing on classic authors!

Next Wednesday she will announce her pick!

*shivers with an-tic-i-PAYshun*

Well, several months after purchase, I think I am getting the hang of using this.

I added all the blogs that could be added through the M’s tonight and will do the rest tomorrow.

I wonder now how this will work with my blogrolling? Should I make another list for the ones that cannot feed to my newz crawler so I can keep the two separate and know which ones to catch up on? Is anything ever easy? *grins*

p.s. If you have RSS’d me, can you let me know if it looks okay? *flips hair* I want the whole post to be readable, not just the first couple of lines.

Found this on Jennifer’s, so I ran over to The Working Mom so I could share it with MY three readers.

This is the weekend to SMILE!

Take six pictures of things that make you smile, put them in your blog and then trackback to The Working Mom!

(dedicated in some weird way to Gurn)

for those who are interested
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I’ve been needing a new boy band!

This one has it all, a disco beat, scantily-clad sexy boys and the video is to die for!

Thanks to Dog-Snot for making my day!

If there is one thing I cannot stand, it is cruelty. And this time, I am talking about human to human cruelty.

And not on a big scale, either. Just the little shit.

Specifically, what my sister (hereafter referred to as the C-Word) does.

Laughs when people get hurt.

You know, the kind of person who laughs when someone falls? That’s C-Word.
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I really wish blogs had existed when I was a teenager. I would probably be a more well-adjusted adult. *grins*
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Not a good day.
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I think everyone’s gardeners should have to come the same day of the week so I only have to listen to weedeaters one day a week. I don’t think that is too much to ask.

I don’t think anyone should have to live near an airport. I think the sound of planes landing and taking off every five minutes leads to insanity.

I would rather the people helping me in the grocery store shut up instead of their fake niceness. Asking me if I need help out when I have one bag that weighs 12 ounces. Saying “Thank You, Mrs. XXX” after staring at my check for a few minutes. What makes them think I am a Mrs?

It should be illegal to say to someone “How are you?” unless you mean it.

Critics should not be allowed to give away the surprises in movies.

Everyone should be able to donate fifty cents per paycheck into a big fund to help senior citizens obtain affordable medicine.

Psychiatric help should be less expensive.

Ads for drugs should be outlawed. My latest pet peeve is the one “if you have suffered depression for at least two weeks, you may need Paxil CR".

Women should be able to sue the drugmakers for using us as guinea pigs for hormone replacement therapy. They’ve been making billions of dollars a year off of us, I say we get some back.

CDs should cost no more than $10.

TV Shows like Extreme Makeovers and the Victoria Secret show (whatever that fucking flesh extravaganza is called) should be REQUIRED to call themselves an Informercial.

The Electoral College system should be given a goldfish burial and flushed down the toilet.

Bosses should not be allowed to tell you that you are unprofessional if you question them. Just because they have a business card and a door on their office does not make them God.

Just because the loggers do not hear the trees screaming does not mean that they don’t.

EVERYONE should hold the door for the next person, regardless of gender.

And lastly,

next time you go through a drive-thru, give $5 toward the next person’s order. I guarantee you’ll feel better about life.

I’m only asking this because I am tired and vulnerable so don’t be mean?

What is Lo-Mo? Lomo?

Thanks for being gentle to the sleepy girl.

Well, thanks to Jennifer, I went and took a test to determine if I could tell real smiles vs fake smiles.

Oddly enough, I correctly identified 10 out of 10 of the genuine smiles.

I guess my bullshit meter is working overtime today.

Thanks for the fun, Jennifer!

Found this at TooMuchSexy.org, and if there is one thing I cannot resist, it is a good God joke.

It seems that God was tired, and wanted to take a vacation. However, being everywhere at once, it was a little difficult for him to decide on where to go. So, he called the Archangel Gabriel in on the carpet…

God: Gabe, I’ve got a problem, and I was hoping you could help me out.

Gabriel: I’ll try lord.

God: Well, I need a vacation, and I can’t decide where I should go, and I was hoping that you could give me some suggestions.

(Gabriel thinks intently for a few seconds…)

Gabriel: How about Mercury? That’s a nice place.

God: Nope, too hot. It takes all night to get over the sun-burn you got during the day.

(Gabriel thinks a little longer…)

Gabriel: Hmm… Well, how about Mars?

God: Nope, Mars is too much of a party place. All that whooping and hollering, I never get any rest when I go there.

(Gabriel is starting to get a little desperate by this time…)

Gabriel: Well, how about Earth?

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go in, if you dare.
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My story for the week is up on my memes blog.

We are so blessed to have had you in our lives! Many happy returns!
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Don’t you hate it when you fill your robe pocket full of those chocolate covered pretzels so you can munch on them while you are reading in bed and then you fall asleep and they melt in your pocket?

What?

That has never happened to you?

Never mind then.

*blushes*

Contents may be disturbing, so if you are prone to hysteria, calling 911 or preaching, please do not read.
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I can’t be bothered with anything. So it goes. What can I say? Today was a complete loss. Such is life. I don’t care.

Current Mood: jejune

Today’s entry courtesy of the Apathetic Online Journal Generator

I want this leather and lace dress that Laurence Fishburne’s wife is wearing.

I think I would have a little more lace in the chestly area. But wow, pretty.

You know, you go through life and you think some things are constants. Like Root Beer and Orange Sodas do NOT have caffeine. It’s just a rule.

So, as I sit here, having just downed my third can of Diet Sunkist Soda, searching for a picture of it so I can show you the weird logo, I find out it has freaking caffeine in it. 28 milligrams. The same as Dr. Pepper.
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Why in the name of all that is precious am I craving Twinkies? I actually dreamed of them last night.

Also, I was just on a blog entering a comment and I thought I saw:

highlight your text then click to LINK, BOLD or CRITICIZE
instead of
highlight your text then click to LINK, BOLD or ITALICIZE

Oh dear.

This is a little musical ditty, complete with a naked guy playing the piano.

Piano Guy

Not work safe.

I’ve never done one, so I tried to do one painting in Photoshop, probably not the best idea.

Anyway. View image

Just a relaxing art project.

You are SO jealous.

I got an email from Bette Midler today.

That’s right, she wanted to let me know how to order Vi4gr4 online.

Please go give Crinkle some birthday love!

She is an A M A Z I N G person. And a right sassy singer in a band!

Spread the word, far and wide!

Oh, this game is addictive! I saw it over at Kadyellebee’s and I hooked! I was going to visit blogs tonight, but now, GIVE ME CURVEBALL!

Did you know I live near a fairly major airport? Well, I do.

And I hate it.

At about this time of day, a plane is coming in to land literally every five minutes. Not only is it noisy, it is s c a r y!

Sometimes the engines are squealing like the whole bloody thing is plummeting to the earth, instead of landing. Sometimes, I just grab my dog and wait for the end.

Now you know one more thing about me.

p.s. Got any valium for my nerves?

I blew it so bad today!

I responded to a WORK email with that phrase “OMFG". I cannot believe I did that. I feel like such an idiot.

Well, I guess if nothing else, they knew I felt passionately about the issue?

*kicks self* *breathe before hitting send, Rori, Breathe!*

I am in a phase about blogging. All a sudden, it seems like people are trying to define what it is, or what kinds there are, and by extension what kinds of people read what kinds of blogs and so on.
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When meds aren’t working.

Go to this site and morph some faces, it’s good fun!

Or how about some truthful and creative eBay feedback?

peace. I have no more juice for this blog today.

I was about 24 and I had just left an abusive marriage and moved to Park City, Utah.

I was ultra thin from the enjoyment misuse of certain chemicals and I was ready to party. My former husband would not even let me wear my clothes tucked in, and I had never been to a bar. Or seen snow.

Watch out.
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OMFG, this ROXOR! I am crying from laughing.

Thanks, Christine!

Have you ever heard of FlyLady? Her website is fantastic for teaching you how to get your harried life in order, simple things to do to help with clutter and cleaning.

I turned to her today after a long absence, because I feel like I need that daily kick in the pants, that little extra bit of You Can Do It.

Well, she is having a movement challenge! Challenging everyone to move 15 minutes a day, send it in to her and she will track it.

Are you up for it? Can you move 15 minutes a day?

Let’s go!

Sometimes I just feel down.

Like this.
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Hello.

In order to preserve some kind of anonymity and not have my name appear in search engines, I am going to start using my nick of Rori on all entries from here on out.

I’m still the same blunt, liberal crazy you have come to know, but just call me Rori.

I will explain the nick in a later entry.

peace.

Someone else was talking about using a Neil Diamond ring tone on her phone.

(forgive me for no trackback, I have not been asleep, and I have been trying to read all the blogs - a to z, and I cannot remember where I saw it.)

I just recently got a new cellphone as part of my renewing my service for another year…

My ring tone? Georgy Girl.
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Watch out. I am a hormonally-challenged woman with tonsillitis today. Heaven alone knows what could happen.

I am feeling so discouraged right now.
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…and I am begging.

PLEASE sign my Guestmap! (points to the sidebar)

I just love these.

Oooh, my first time at Dirty Questions! I even stole the button! (points to the right)

Here is the question:

Have you ever met people who are sexy simply because of the job they have? (snip)This week’s question is to be answered in stages. First, do you agree that it’s all about the job? Back up your opinion if you disagree. Second, what are the sexiest jobs, and what traits about the job make it sexy? I think we’ll get a lot of good answers this week, and please, can we limit the fireman posts?

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I am staying home today. Alone. And I am ecstatic with that decision.

I was invited to a quasi-family gathering, a meal to celebrate…something. I am not sure what. In a family that does Seders and Easter, a girl can get confused.

(I say quasi- because not everyone will be there, just my brother and his “Hi, I am in Law School, therefore, I am smarter than everyone else in the room, so please do not bother talking, as I will pontificate for hours” wife.)
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Did you know that Peeps have been the subject of intense research?

No?

Well, go check it out!

(warning: The truth is revealed about those little beady black Peep eyes)

Just an update on the latest in my journey.
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Meegan was talking about deleting names from her address book, cell phone, etc.

I have been through this experience, it’s almost like a spiritual awakening, when you realize that 90% of the people you send birthday cards to do not even know when you were born, or even act as if they care that you ever existed in their lives.
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This day is going to suck. I just feel it in my bones.

I think if I need any morale boosting today, I will just come back here and look at THIS!

If you do not know about this rich traditional Jewish holiday, it’s never to late to learn.

Here is a page which explains it all in very simple terms, why the traditions, why certain foods are eaten, etc.

I LOVE her new CD.

I strongly recommend it.

She is one of the women I consider to be very strong, and very cool.

Go Lisa Marie!
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Earthlink has been giving me fits lately, and I’ve had loads of down time. I will be doing some major catching up this weekend.

peace

I scored today!

Wahey!

If you have never played Neopets, I highly recommend it!

This entry is ONLY for DaGoddess. No one else can read, mmm-kay?

DaGoddess writes:

What the hell is a reacharound?
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I cut my hair today! Well, actually I had it done.

Before and After!

I love it.

I was keeping it long because I loved the feel of it on my bare back, but really, how often am I bare backed? *snort*

I am so glad I found this woman who is my therapist. She is the first one I have ever been with who has “broken” me… down come my walls, out come the tears. It’s good.
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Try this new medicine.
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I fucked up. I swapped hours with some people at work and now I am working 10 days in a row.

*kicks self in the ass*

Needless to say, I am not blogging as much as I want.

I just want you to know, I will visit everyone who pimped themselves or others.

I am also blogrolling like mad, because now with this BlogShares thing, my link to you is better than a reacharound, because it makes you more valuable. (in some imaginary way)

Mmmmmm. Delicious.

As a courtesy, you should just give someone one.

Know what I mean?

Okay, did anyone else’s Mom cut their bangs like this?

And the dress? Dear G-d.

of life at last I found you!

This stuff is so good it’s gotta be bad.

But it’s comfort food!

Leaving in extended, since some are not interested in this part of One Girl’s Life
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I just wrote this really long revealing blog about my pysch visit, my dreams, some feelings about myself and a revenge plan I am preparing to put in motion.

But because Mr. Earthlink DSL is apparently having some performance issues, he lost my entry after it was submitted. Mr DSL may need a little blue pill.

Well, I just hope that this slow internet shit is cleared before tomorrow’s work. For someone like me, who multi-tasks at warp speed to be slowed down to Windows 3.1 speed … well, you might as well just sedate me. I prefer Vicodin if you do.

Pffffffffffffffft. And the dreams had sex in them and everything. Gone. All gone.

Ok here it is.

View image
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No one is leaving comments.

That’s it.

Next entry will contain nudity.

I cannot believe I am resorting to this.

Fear fills me tonight.
If being awake stalls dawn,
awake I will be.

I wish on a star
that tomorrow brings no war
Fear fills me tonight.

Please President Bush
There is a different way
Killing is not good.

Strong America
We are much better than this
Don’t resort to war.

Now my goodnight plea
As I lay me down to sleep
PLEASE let there be peace.

Well, after driving around in the pouring rain with the windows down, bundled up in my black leather jacket singing to that SEXY Garth Brooks song, you know the one:

She had a need to feel the thunder
To chase the lightning from the sky
To watch a storm with all its wonder
Written in her lover’s eyes

I came home and watched TV. Woohoo, party at Robin’s house!

Trading Spaces. Not real crazy about either room, but I did enjoy the many shots of Ty Pennington’s lower back. Rawr! And when he said something about putting caulk in the crack, I had to rewind to be sure I heard correctly.

SNL. Had to give up and record some of it for watching tomorrow as I want to play on the computer. But I LOVED the Weekend Update story about how people are now calling French Fries “Freedom Fries". Tina Fey said “and in France, they are calling American cheese ‘idiot cheese’.’ Go Tina!

(note: for an excellent blog rant about “freedom fries, go here!)

The spoof of the Are You Hot show with the cartoon characters was hysterical! Cartoon Lorenzo Lamas saying he dropped a milkshake in his lap while judging Cinderella! And Barney “well hung’ Rubble! I could watch Robert Smigel stuff every day.

I know, my life is so exciting you wonder how I find time to blog. Admit it, that is what you are thinking right now.

Jesus playing sports with very white little Catholic kids.
Odd, only American sports.

Doesn’t Jesus play Cricket?

I just accidentally ripped something.

A one-page advert the February 24, 1976 issue of Variety Magazine.

Here is a partial scan.

I am literally sick to my stomach.
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I swear, dreams should be erasable.

In last night’s dream, I borrowed a Jaguar car from someone, had it stolen, the cops believed the thief…

Segue to me being at this REALLY smart couple’s house, unable to get up their steep stairs for being out of shape and wearing nothing but red tape over my nipples and pink crepe paper around my bottom.

Small wonder I wake up neurotic.

This is a 3-Stanza Haiku, written especially for YOU, by OneGirl.

Hump Day is over.
It felt like torture all day.
It should be not be so.

Perhaps a real hump,
a lay, a poke, a reaming,
would make it better.

But to my dismay
no nooner on the schedule.
I suffer alone.

The End

I have decided to put all these entries into a new category, so folks who do not want to read them can just move right along.
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I am so excited, I see a new shrink tomorrow - (eep, later today!)

I have been playing tag with this one woman for a couple of weeks, but since my last call to her to attempt setting up an appointment has gone unanswered for over a week, I am finished with her.
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Telling myself…. step away from the blog! Quit Tweaking!

Paul McCartney said on the making of “A Hard Day’s Night”

“And getting up early. That was one of those things. We had to get up about six o’clock in the morning, you know, sometimes. Which is– oh– I’m sure it’s not good for anyone, that. It’s very bad for your health.”

I wonder what going to BED at 6 am does for you?

I might have to buy this on eBay.

Oh, how I adored him.

I actually got to see him in person TWICE.
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edit 2-27-2003: I fell for a hoax!

Thanks Jamie and Scott for letting me know!

Here’s the article.

(original entry)
Seems there’s a new rage in fashion in Japan.

No, these are not the girl’s actual panties, they are printed on her skirt fabric.

I hate having depression/bi-polarII whatever you want to call it.

And since it’s my blog and I can whine and cry and pout if I want to… I am going to.

Move along. This is going to be way random.
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I am so excited, they finally opened a Curves in my town!

They are supposed to be awesome gyms, and women only! Which for me, is a must.

Anyone else belong or have any experience to share?

Well, I cannot figure out how to do skins. But I am going to get some help.

Yes, I am still awake, I worked a night shift tonight. It was fun, well, maybe more like different, rather than fun. (Oh, but the goofiest thing I did was mistake the hours. The shift was 8:30-12:30, so guess who was up and ready to go at 8:30 AM! Me! Such a dork. It was 8:30 PM that it started!)

Went shopping today and got one of these little goodies:

That’s a Kacheek in case you don’t know, and it is from Neopets. Mine will always be showing the “Do Not Disturb” side.

Gads, I am boring myself. I will stop torturing you.

I must learn how to skin this blog. It has become an obsession.

So, that’s where I am going to be.

I wonder where Joanie is, and a candle is lit for Robyn and Todd. Bless their hearts.

Spoiler protected, so you have to click open to read more.
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My friend Gurn, who I am PLEADING WITH to get a blog sent me these.

And, since they made me giggle, I am including them here.

1. I can see your point, but I still think you’re full of shit.

2. I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to
pronounce.

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

4. I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in
public.

5. I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship
me.
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Yesterday sucked.

I work from home and Friday, I got hacked. Lovely.

So, now because I was hacked due to a security issue with Internet Explorer, (yes, that’s right, did you know IE5.5 and above does not protect you from cookie grabbers?) I have to use Netscape for work.

Has anyone used Netscape lately? It sucks. I used to be a big fan, as my buddy Gurn will testify, but now, it is AWFUL! It does not even recognize the commands of my 5-button mouse!

(the open me button should say: and she continues to whine)
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I made it through the weekend, even though we are on Orange Alert.

I fought back my rising tide of panic and did NOT order my terrorism survival guide for $97.

I considered taking the Australian Migration Eligibility Assessment, but decided that move would not be prudent at this time.

I got a “Jesus Christ, Robin” from my stepfather when I asked him to tell me why Bush is a good President. Followed shortly thereafter by a “Don’t tell me you are a goddamn liberal". And on the heels of that, the sternest admonition yet “Okay, little Miss ACLU, just think how much worse it would be if Gore was the President right now".

It was a fine orangey weekend. Is purple an alert color? It’s my favorite. I think I will be at my best when we are on Purple alert.

Ah, Saturday. I get off work Friday night at 7:30 and I am ready to relax.

Tonight, I watched The Banger Sisters and I really liked it. I love movies that remind me of the 60s and the boundaries that were broken back then. People just don’t realize.

Next, thanks to my buddy Gurn, I became aware that my hero, Brendan Fraser, was going to be on Letterman, so I got naked and watched that.

Now, I am just winding down. Worrying about:

Paisley. My poor dog’s allergies are making her insane. Princess Paisley Sparkle, aka Muppet Face, aka Simumu, aka Love Dog Deux. Click and look at that sweet face!

She has had terrible allergies since I got her when she was six months old. She is not even two years old now. I have tried everything and she is just miserable.

Rewind, I have tried almost everything. But now, I am making the commitment to the Barf Diet and am ordering all that I need to get her started.

Barf=Biologically Appropriate Raw Food. It’s basically raw meaty bones, muscle meat, offal and some veggies. So, that is our next adventure.

Yep. It’s here.

This is the day I was set loose on my course with life.
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and I am a sugar-oholic.
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Jesus is moving on.
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I LOVE Circus Peanuts.

No, not the crunchy guys in salty shell that elephants eat, the OTHER kind.

THESE!

And so inexpensive! Only 50 cents per package for a 1 serving size!

The ingredients say that my little orange masterpieces MAY contain traces of Tree Nuts (walnuts, almosnds, pecans, cashews, brazil nuts, hazelnuts, pistachios or macadamias) so I believe they come by their categorizatrion as a nut candy fair and square.
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THANK God!

I was waiting to hear the outcome of this class-action suit, filed on behalf on children who blamed McDonalds for their health problems.

I applaud that judge.
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I was shopping for some new underwear the other day and I just started wondering…

Are there really women who pay over $5 each for every pair of panties they own?

I am a Hanes Her Way girl…
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Just wondering, does anyone out there in blog land have one of these contraptions?

I am considering a purchase of one… in fact, I am driving to San Diego this weekend to go test drive one in person.

Just thought I would see if anyone has one, used one, loved one, hated one?

Oh, so pretty,
I feel pretty and witty and bright!
And I pity
Any blog who isn’t me tonight!

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My dear, “Princess", which is my code name for you here… you know who you are….
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I’ve decided to call 2003 “The Year for Me".

I’m tired of feeling rudderless, adrift, as if I am simply being buffeted along in life, with no direction, no passion.

I am not sure when I lost my way, or if I ever even had it, but I know that the way I have been living is not the way I want to continue.

This is an extremely long ramble, so only the brave should click more.
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1. Stay in or go out on New Year’s Eve?
Staying In.

2. If you stay home, do you stay up to ring in the new year, or fall asleep earlier?
I ring in the New Year

3. If you go out, do you prefer to attend a party at someone’s home, or go to a bar/nightclub/restaurant?
IF I was going out, I would go to a nightclub.
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