Okay, I am all for a nice interlude in the shower.

But look at this microphone?

Lame.

I think this one would be better. (adult content warning)

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Some people in Maryland are suing Wal-Mart because there was not a warning label on a CD they bought and it had the word “Fuck” in one of the lyrics.

Also, they are seeking damages of up to $74,500 each.

The album they purchased? Evanescence.

Okay, since when did the responsibility of censoring what your child hears fall solely onto the retailer?

For fuck’s sake, if your kid wants an album, go home and check it out first.

I swear sometimes in the evening, I feel like smoke from other apartments is in my apartment.

Either that or my mom’s ghost is around and she is smoking.

It’s a biggish picture.

I owe this ALL to Gwen, a queen among women.

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Comedian Lewis Black on Homeland Security:

“There should be three levels of warning on homeland security: ‘Jesus Christ!’ ‘Goddammit!’ and ‘Fuck Me!’”

ganked from ass_

Canadian Court Approves Same-Sex Marriage

Gordon Young, pastor of the First Assembly of God Church in St. John’s, Newfoundland, was highly disappointed by the ruling.

“It’s a sad day for our country,” Young told CBC television news. “God is in the DNA of this nation. We believe that changing the definition of marriage is changing the divine institution that God put in place for the order of our society.”

Oh, PUH-leeeeeeeeeeeeze.

I am seriously contemplating saving up enough money to move there.

Article from news.yahoo.com behind the cut.
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This morning I was thinking about Julia Roberts.

I know, that in and of itself is scary.

I was thinking about all the stuff in the news lately about her twins, and once again, how she “stole” Danny Moder.

So, then I started thinking about Jerry Seinfeld. His wife Jessica was married when he “stole” her away from her husband. In fact, I think they were barely back from their honeymoon.

However, it both of these cases, it is the woman that was vilified. I do not get that. The men had just as much part in this. It’s not like Danny Moder was clinging to Vera saying “No Julia, please no, I am married” and Julia said “No, you will be mine” as she was stabbing his fingers so he would let go of Vera.

I’m just sayin’.

So, I got my pink Christmas tree, as seen at DaisyDo.

It is now proudly in my office, with hot pink and pearl ornaments, with a couple beanie babies and a dreidel game underneath it.

People are coming in all aghast. Even my boss said “I hope people don’t take it the wrong way".

WTF? I am getting the vibe that somehow my tree is not Christian. Unlike their green trees with various colored ornaments and lights on them.

ARE PEOPLE THAT FUCKING STUPID?

Apparently.

Now I am wishing I had gotten a rainbow tree, hung pot leaves and posted a huge sign that said “All I want for Christmas is legalized Gay Marriage and Medicinal Marijuana". Freaks.

I just burned this.

I was going to put the Bing Crosby/David Bowie on there, but it was the wrong version.

I know, you wish you were me. It’s okay.

p.s. I know “O Holy Night” is on there twice. I love that song so much I pondered burning a CD of nothing but that song in different versions. If you know where I can get it in French, let me know.

p.p.s. I am not a Christian, I just like Christmas songs.

Enjoy this tune.

Hanukkah Blessings, by Barenaked Ladies

Right click and save, or your balls are mine.

I got this from Wigglebottoms.

My first attempt garnered me an ooopsie, you are bad.

Hi! I’m Santa’s Head Elf!
Unless I’m terribly mistaken, it looks like you just wrote something that had a naughty word in it! I’m quite sure my little elfin eye saw you typing a word that looked an awful lot like “u@smell “. Good thing I caught it before anyone had a chance to read it. Otherwise, you would have ended up on the Naughty List for sure! (See, you never know when an elf might be watching you! *wink*).

I think it was me telling him I would tell people he smelled like butt if I did not get what I wanted.

Okay, I got it through by saying I would tell people he had the aroma on a men’s bathroom after an overdose of ExLax.

And here is my reply: (edited the boring parts out)
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If you are planning on changing yellow and magenta toners at work, black pants are bad. v.v. bad.

I feel so much sympathy for his family. Do not get me wrong.

This rant is about the LIES told surrounding his unfortunate death.

The Lie

“After coming under fire, Tillman’s patrol got out of their vehicles and gave chase, moving toward the spot of the ambush. Beevers said the fighting was “sustained” and lasted 15-20 minutes. Beevers said Tillman was killed by enemy fire, but he had no information about what type of weapons were involved in the assault, or whether he died instantly.”

The Truth

It found that Tillman was shot to death on April 22 after a U.S. soldier mistakenly fired on a friendly Afghan soldier in Tillman’s unit, and other U.S. soldiers then fired in the same direction.

Our government disgusts me. This “war” disgusts me.

And while I am at it, and again, DO NOT GET ME WRONG, Tillman’s death was tragic. However, I also think that the man who enlisted, and gave up the first years of his first child’s life is just as heroic as a football player who gave up a couple million.

Yeah. It’s one of those days. Ask me to do something for you, and I will probably fuck it up.

WHERE is my head?

Last night, as I was trying to sleep and could not stop the tears, I think I figured out why I am so depressed this year.

As you may or may not know, my mom died on January 7, 2002. Sadly, loss of a parent is a different kind of grief. It just keeps feeling like the wound gets reopened all the time.

I think what I am feeling now is the impending sense of doom. And what if. December always reminds me.

What if, in December of 2001, I had known how sick my mom was becoming.
What if, my fucking sister had called me, and I could have been there to say goodbye, and tell her how much I loved her.
What if, I had given her the present I was saving for her birthday.
What if, I had not erased all my voice mail messages, so i could still hear her voice.
What if, I had known it was the last time I would hug her or see her.

It’s unbearable at times.

Tonight is the rerun of her gaffe, even though it was edited out.

I just caught her first song.

A) SO obvious she is lyp-synching.
B) Her movements are so… contrived.
C) that fucking batty-eyelash-flirt thing with the camera?

Some one please come over and flog me till I bleed. That would be preferable to seeing her perform again.

A man forced his way into a primary school in northeast China Friday and stabbed and injured 12 grade-one pupils, the latest in a wave of recent school attacks in China, Xinhua news agency said.

The man, whose identity was unknown, was seized and the injured pupils taken to hospital near the school in the northeast province of Jilin, the agency said.

A series of attacks on schoolchildren in China in recent months have prompted schools in Beijing and other cities to recruit professional guards.

Last month, a man broke into a Chinese school dormitory in the central province of Henan and stabbed eight children to death in their sleep.

A bus driver stabbed 24 primary school children with a kitchen knife and kidnapped a nine-year-old girl at a primary school in eastern Shandong province in September.

The same month, a man with a knife and homemade bombs attacked 28 children in a kindergarten in the city of Suzhou, near Shanghai. No one was killed. In August, a janitor stabbed 17 at a Beijing kindergarten, killing one child.

Chinese police arrested a man accused of killing a 5-year-old boy and his teacher at a Beijing kindergarten in October.

Holy fuck.

source

You ready? No liquids in your mouth?

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and Afton! So cool to share a birthday!

I hope you had a great day with Griffin and Holden.

*hugs*